New Apple Glass

Glass: Chinese marijuana - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Wine and children speak the truth. - Greek Proverb

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

The glass is half full, not half empty. - John Milton

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

Computer logic is no substitute for human wisdom. - Unknown

Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the one who asked why. - Bernard Baruch

We see through a glass darkly because all we want is to be comfortable. - Ravi Zacharias

If it weren't for my adam's apple, I'd have no shape at all. - Phyllis Diller

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul. - George Bernard Shaw

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

In Hollywood, the women are all peaches. It makes one long for an apple occasionally. - W Somerset Maugham

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'll bring ya a bottle of champagne. Maybe I'll even bring home a whole maggot. - Archie Bunker

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved. - Rose Kennedy

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

People who wonder whether the glass is half empty or half full miss the point. The glass is refillable. - Simon Sinek

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose. - Andy Rooney