#1 humor site on the 'net

Kids Meal

Humour for both dinner and license plates

Kids Meal thanks to Julie Kimmel

License Plate humor in Virginia

QuotaBills
Germs: The only things kids will share freely - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Titillate: A tardy meal for a breast-fed baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Eat: What kids do between meals, but not at them - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

A crude meal, no doubt, but the best of all sauces is hunger. - Edward Abbey

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

A meal without cheese is like a beautiful woman who lacks an eye. - Jean A Brillat-Savarin

Dubm Waiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water Hazard: Giving the kids too much to drink before a road trip - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Kids: they dance before they learn there is anything that isn't music. - William Stafford

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

I'm pretty intentional about being highly invested in my kids' lives. - Mark Batterson

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

Spoiled Rotten: What the kids become after as little as 15 minutes with Grandma - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

The sun looks down on nothing half so good as a household laughing together over a meal. - C S Lewis

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffett

If we would listen to our kids, we'd discover that they are largely self-explanatory. - Robert Brault

Because: Mom's reason for having kids do things which can't be explained logically - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. - Erma Bombeck

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

You know you're a mom when you go to the store for yourself and come out with a bag of things for your kids. - Unknown

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Technology is just a tool. In terms of getting the kids working together and motivating them, the teacher is the most important. - Bill Gates

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

Fang took the entire family out for coffee and donuts the other night. The kids enjoyed it. It was the first time they'd ever given blood. - Phyllis Diller

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah


Baby Formula

Kid Suction

Redneck Moving Truck

Critter Control

Lost Dog

Nail Chair

Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved