#1 humor site on the 'net

Kids Meal

Humour for both dinner and license plates

Kids Meal thanks to Julie Kimmel

License Plate humor in Virginia

QuotaBills
Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

One can say everything best over a meal. - George Eliot

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

With kids, the days are long, but the years are short. - John Leguizamo

You know what's cool? My kids think I'm ordinary. - Michael J. Fox

A crude meal, no doubt, but the best of all sauces is hunger. - Edward Abbey

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

We've had bad luck with our kids - they've all grown up. - Christopher Morley

Jackpot: When all the kids stay at friends' homes for the night - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As a kid, I got three meals a day. Oatmeal, miss-a-meal and no meal. - Mr. T

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'd like to be the ideal mother, but I'm too busy raising my kids. - Unknown

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

Money can't buy you happiness? Well, check this out: I bought myself a happy meal. - Paul F Taylor

The rich take life one financial year at a time. The poor take life one meal at a time. - Mokokoma Mokhonoana

I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal. - Groucho Marx

The sun looks down on nothing half so good as a household laughing together over a meal. - C S Lewis

A rich person should leave his kids enough to do something, but not enough to do nothing. - Warren Buffett

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

I just want to make sure when I have kids, I can spend time with them. That's the whole point. - Mark Zuckerberg

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out. - Erma Bombeck

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Technology is just a tool. In terms of getting the kids working together and motivating them, the teacher is the most important. - Bill Gates

The remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. - Calvin Trillin

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah


Be GarFul

Tooth Ferry

Ready For Rabbits

Ecosystem

Plumber's Night Light

Can I Lick The Bowl

Redneck Shelves

Google Classic

In Touch Today

Delicious Grief

Amplified Beer

How to Twerk at Work

$383.00 Paint Job

Wine Time Finally

Scooter Hearse

Thailand Ferry

Hard Hat Safety

Water Coolant

Spray-On Clothing

Bright Bookshelf

Saddle Surprise

Politicians Be Like

Senior Aerobics

Foiled Again