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Kenwood Chef

This chef does everything but cook

Kenwood Chef thanks to Mike King

Men that don't last long in the kitchen or house

QuotaBills
Take my wife - please! - Henny Youngman

My wife gives good headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage is the sunset of love. - French Proverb

These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

Malaria: Several shopping centers close to each other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

Marriage has many pains, but celibacy has not pleasure. - Samuel Johnson

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects. - Les Dawson

One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife. - Groucho Marx

A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short. - Andre Maurois

Marriage, like a submarine, is only safe if you get all the way inside. - Frank Pittman

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

My best friend ran away with my wife. And let me tell you, I really miss him. - Henny Youngman

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. - Irish Proverb

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive. - Oscar Wilde

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

Every time I try to make my marriage more exciting, my wife finds out about it right away. - Bob Monkhouse

A good marriage was one in which each person thought he or she was getting the better deal. - Anne Lamott

In Las Vegas, a man said to his wife, "Give me the money I told you not to give me." - Henny Youngman

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation. - Mark Twain

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. - Rodney Dangerfield

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it; 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. - Patrick Murra

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage. - Robert Anderson

Being a dad isn't just about eating a huge bag of gummy bears as your wife gives birth. It means being comfortable with the word 'hero.' - Ryan Reynolds


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