#1 humor site on the 'net

I Do What I Want

On the cutting edge of unique decisions

I Do What I Want thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Going against the general trend

QuotaBills
Spoils Of War: Army food - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first. - Ernestine Ulmer

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

There ain't no such thing as wrong food. - Sean Stewart

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

Some people are so much sunshine to the square inch. - Walt Whitman

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it. - Boris Johnson

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

Food is not just eating energy. It's an experience. - Guy Fieri

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

Dubm Waiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Writing is only the frosting on my cake. I'm whole without it. - Tabitha King

"Let 'em eat cake," to quote the late Mark Antonette. - Archie Bunker

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake. - Bob Hope

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. - Chris Rock

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world. - JRR Tolkien

Most fat food is fried. Fried food tastes great, and people don't seem to care about the fat aspect. - Eric Schlosser

Food: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question, "What's for dinner tonight?" - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Children today are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers. - Socrates

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

I refuse to believe that trading recipes is silly. Tuna-fish casserole is at least as real as corporate stock. - Barbara Harrison

I wouldn't pay for a personal trainer, but I would pay someone to just knock unhealthy food out of my hands. - Bill Murray

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

Every time you use the word 'healthy,' you lose. The key is to make yummy, delicious food that happens to be healthy. - Marcus Samuelsson

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

If you're trying to create a company, it's like baking a cake. You have to have all the ingredients in the right proportion. - Elon Musk

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie


Click Click Imaging Specialists

Awkward

Soldier Salute

You Turn

Australia 101 For Tourists

Horse Wood Sculpture

Changing Priorities Ahead

Fishing With Moses

Expired Marriage

Goose Walkers

Minion HotHead

Christopher Walken

Greek Financial Path

Miss Afghanistan Finalists

Fawn Of You

Swimming in the Dead Sea

Redneck Beer Stacker

Hot Summer Days

mIndians

Mouthful Of Information

Happy Face Sandwich

Senior Eye Exam

Chubby Free

Pirrows