Historic Texting

History is written by the victors. - Niccolo Machiavelli

What is history but a fable agreed upon? - Napoleon Bonaparte

For fast-acting relief, try slowing down. - Lily Tomlin

Live out of your imagination, not your history. - Stephen R. Covey

I graduated first in my class from alibi school. - Jeffrey McDaniel

Bison: What you say when your child leaves for school - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

History books that contain no lies are extremely dull. - Anatole France

History may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme a lot. - Mark Twain

History would be a wonderful thing - if it were only true. - Leo Tolstoy

U.S. history - that's part of your whole American heresy. - Archie Bunker

History never looks like history when you are living through it. - John W. Gardner

It is the soothing thing about history that it does repeat itself. - Gertrude Stein

A poet in history is divine, but a poet in the next room is a joke. - Max Eastman

If some countries have too much history, we have too much geography. - William Lyon Mackenzie King

The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy. - Henry Brightman

Marriage requires a special talent like acting. Monogamy requires genius. - Warren Beatty

If the cavemen had known how to laugh, history would have been different. - Oscar Wilde

There's a good reason why nobody studies history. It just teaches you too much. - Noam Chomsky

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

People are prisoners of their phones; that's why it's called a 'cell' phone. - Unknown

I want flowers, I don't want to text. What does that make me? What kind of dinosaur am I? - Jennifer Garner

Great acting is being able to create a character. Great character is being able to be yourself. - John Leguizamo

I work with gold that holds history, diamonds that see the future, and rubies that long for love. - Waris Ahluwalia

I can't understand why I flunked American history. When I was a kid there was so little of it. - George Burns

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country. - Kurt Vonnegut

If the lessons of history teach us anything it is that nobody learns the lessons that history teaches us. - Unknown

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present. - Bil Keane

One of the lessons of history is that nothing is often a good thing to do and always a clever thing to say. - Will Durant

That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history. - Aldous Huxley

In my last year of school, I was voted Class Optimist and Class Pessimist. Looking back, I realize I was only half right. - Jack Nicholson

I went to a Catholic boys' school for a year, but that was to play hockey. Religion class was quite contentious for me. - Keanu Reeves

Over the years, I learned so much from mom. She taught me about the importance of home and history and family and tradition. - Martha Stewart

If Beethoven had been killed in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two, it would have changed the history of music... and of aviation. - Tom Stoppard

In the real world, the smartest people are people who make mistakes and learn. In school, the smartest people don't make mistakes. - Robert T Kiyosaki

It is always self-defeating to pretend to the style of a generation younger than your own; it simply erases your own experience in history. - Renata Adler

Hillary Clinton was the worst Secretary of State in the history of the country. The world came apart under her reign as Secretary of State. - Donald Trump

God created us for love, for union, for forgiveness and compassion and, yet, that has not been our storyline. That has not been our history. - Richard Rohr

I love to play hide and seek with my kid, but some days my goal is to find a hiding place where he can't find me until after high school. - Unknown

Mushroom: 1. A motel for quickies; 2. The place where they store the school food; 3. A room that has no sides, no walls, no doors and no ceilings. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison