Gone To The Dogs

Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

There are no traffic jams on the extra mile. - Zig Ziglar

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. - Unknown

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

She died doing what she loved, taking a selfie in traffic. - Unknown

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

Drive slow and enjoy the scenery. Drive fast and join the scenery. - Douglas Horton

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

I admit, I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives forty miles away. - Phyllis Diller

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

When I got outta High School I was driving a truck. I was just a poor boy from Memphis. - Elvis Presley

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk

Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by traffic from both sides. - Margaret Thatcher

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Education makes a people easy to lead, but difficult to drive; easy to govern but impossible to enslave. - Henry Brougham

I hired a chauffeur and I became a motivational speaker, because I don’t drive - I'm driven.
 - Jarod Kintz

Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

There is a blessed necessity by which the interest of men is always driving them to the right, and making all crime mean and ugly. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The road to success is not easy to navigate, but with hard work, drive and passion, it's possible to achieve the American dream. - Tommy Hilfiger

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. - Sloan Wilson

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright