#1 humor site on the 'net

Everything OK Bar

Flowchart direction to flowing drinks

Everything OK Bar thanks to Keith Blake

Attention getting sign - whether you agree with it or not

QuotaBills
Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown

An old man in a house is a good sign. - Benjamin Franklin

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown

Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields

If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu

How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? - George Carlin

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. - Tom Waits

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

A great many people think that polysyllables are a sign of intelligence. - Barbara Walters

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. - Frank Sinatra

The sign said "eight items or less." So I changed my name to Les. - Steven Wright

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

All I want is peace, love, understanding, and a chocolate bar bigger than my head. - Unknown

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

If you are discouraged it is a sign of pride, because it shows you trust in your own powers. - Mother Teresa

If the sign on your heart says, "WELCOME", the love will come pouring in from everywhere. - Susan Jeffers

It's a sign of age if you feel like the morning after the night before and you haven't been anywhere. - Unknown

Crying doesn't indicate that you are weak. Ever since you were born it's been a sign that you are alive. - Unknown

There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

I have made an important discovery - that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication. - Oscar Wilde

The greatest sign of success for a teacher is to be able to say, "The children are now working as if I did not exist." - Maria Montessori

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

I'm pretty sure that eating chocolate keeps wrinkles away because I have never seen a 10 year old with a Hershey bar and crows feet. - Amy Neftzger

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison


Fried Eggs - Military Style

Tourist Baggage

Amish Sailboat

Aging Cyclist

Best Tea Cup

Shoddy Goaltending - Not

Roller Derby Princess

Redneck Hotter Tub

Walk The Line

Sidewalk Jammies

Senior Center Reminder

Time Of Day

Waiting Is Good

Solar Charging

Submergible

Fast Closure

Penalty Shot

Redneck Date

Non-Hot Dog

Unattended Children

Open Goal Forgiveness

Double Your Vision

How To Become A Pirate

He Did It