#1 humor site on the 'net

Down Sign

Pedestrian road signs that get your attention

Down Sign thanks to Barry McCartney

The down side of traffic sign art

The beginning of a high five?

QuotaBills
Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

I will not down to posterity talking bad grammar. - Benjamin Disraeli

But the ultimate lesson is just sit down and write. - Wole Soyinka

Australian Kiss: Same as French Kiss, only down under - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It only rains straight down. God doesn't do windows. - Steven Wright

The kind man feeds his cat before sitting down to dinner. - Hebrew Proverb

Getting to the top is optional. Getting down is mandatory. - Ed Viesturs

Elevator: A metal container used to move sardines up and down. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

If it is your time, love will track you down like a cruise missile. - Lynda Barry

If you want to change the world, don't back down from the sharks! - William H. McRaven

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it. - Lou Holtz

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up. - Ogden Nash

Anytime you suffer a setback or disappointment, put your head down and plow ahead. - Les Brown

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done easily lying down. - Woody Allen

I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole. - Unknown

Some people not only expect opportunity to knock, they expect it to beat the door down. - Unknown

I walk around like everything if fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off. - Unknown

Sorrow you can hold, however desolating, if nobody speaks to you. If they speak, you break down. - Bede Jarrett

Trust is built one block at a time, but when it is violated the entire wall comes crashing down. - David Branker

Consultants are people who come down from the hill to shoot the wounded after the battle is over. - Doc Blakeley

I have the ability to build myself up or break myself down. I stay positive. Strength comes from within. - Hayley Williams

You can spend your precious energy beating down closed doors, or you can choose the doors that open when you knock. - Unknown

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there. - George Burns

It is often wonderful how putting down on paper a clear statement of a case helps one to see, not perhaps the way out, but the way in. - Arthur Christopher Benson

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

Overnight success just doesn't happen. You've got to put your time in. You're up and down - all of a sudden, it just clicks. - Anthony Calvillo

When my time on Earth is gone and my activities here are past, I want that they should bury me upside down so my critics can kiss my ass. - Bobby Knight

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

We are in a problem, and the problem is we are in a terrible sector... Las Vegas is overbuilt and doing badly, and we get pulled down by that. - Donald Trump

I'd love to see Christ come back to crush the spirit of hate and make men put down their guns. I'd also like just one more hit single. - Tiny Tim

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright

A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you. - C S Lewis

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you. - Helen Rowland

Lawyers are like unrequited lovers: you give them an inch, and they go for the whole nine yards; you take off one shoe, and they pull down your pants. - Andres Rueda


Skateboard Statue

WipeOut

Turtle Truck

How To Burn Fat

Unplugged

Praying & Preying Mantis

Good Driver

Overpass Passover

Fire Starter

Sinus Remedy - How To Clear Out Your Nostrils

Auto Strap

Never Run a Red Light

Bee Safe

Hummers Only Look Tough

Tactical Texas

Defence Budget Cuts

Welfare State

No Flies On Me

Stick Family Meal

Wet Floor

Lord Of The Watch

Close Encounters of the Whale Kind

Military Watch Tower

No Go Intersection