#1 humor site on the 'net

Dentist Drill

Quicker technique allows for faster patient billing

Dentist Drill thanks to Mel Hardman

Once the drilling is done it becomes painless dentistry

QuotaBills
Floss like a boss! - Unknown

Keep calm and floss on. - Unknown

Teeth are always in style. - Dr. Seuss

Irony is the hygiene of the mind. - Elizabeth Bibesco

Dentist Office: A filling station - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

We break bones and we lose teeth. We play rugby. - Martin Johnson

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. - Unknown

My friend has false teeth - with braces on them. - Steven Wright

Too much freedom can lead to the soul's decay. - Prince

Most every dental school has discount dental services. - Matthew Lesko

Even pearls are dark before the whiteness of his teeth. - William R. Alger

Love conquers all things - except poverty and toothache. - Mae West

Every tooth in a man's head is more valuable than a diamond. - Miguel de Cervantes

If I'm feeling really wild I don't floss before bedtime. - Judith Viorst

A dentist at work in his vocation always looks down in the mouth. - George D. Prentice

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

The man with a toothache thinks everyone happy whose teeth are sound. - George Bernard Shaw

Harmony makes small things grow; lack of it makes great things decay. - Sallust

Now Bart, since you broke Grandpa's teeth, he gets to break yours. - Homer Simpson

It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks. - Pierre Renoir

If a patient cannot clean his teeth, no dentist can clean them for him. - Martin H. Fischer

You know you're getting old if you have more fingers than real teeth. - Rodney Dangerfield

We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller

I told my dentist my teeth are going yellow. he told me to wear a brown tie. - Rodney Dangerfield

The grinding of the intellect is for most people as painful as a dentist's drill. - Leonard Woolf

Adam and Eve had many advantages but the principal one was that they escaped teething. - Mark Twain

If suffering brought wisdom, the dentist's office would be full of luminous ideas. - Mason Cooley

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

A physician buries his mistakes, a dentist pulls them out, but a teacher has to live with them. - Unknown

Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records. - Unknown

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

Some tortures are physical
And some are mental,
But the one that is both
is dental. - Ogden Nash

Some old women and men grow bitter with age. The more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get. - George D. Prentice

It is guaranteed to put all teeth on edge, including George Washington's, wherever they might be. - Vincent Canby

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. - Johnny Carson

Most men would rather have their bellies opened for five hundred dollars than have a tooth pulled for five. - Martin H. Fischer

Sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss. - Unknown

Many of us are at the 'metallic' age - gold in our teeth, silver in our hair, and lead in our pants. - Unknown

I don't get off on romantic parts. But I often think if I had had my dental work done early on, well, maybe. - Morgan Freeman

All satire is blind to the forces liberated by decay. Which is why total decay has absorbed the forces of satire. - Theodor Adorno

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

He who rejects change is the architect of decay. The only human institution which rejects progress is the cemetery. - Harold Wilson

Nothing soothes me more after a long and maddening course of pianoforte recitals than to sit and have my teeth drilled. - George Bernard Shaw

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

To the person with a toothache, even if the world is tottering, there is nothing more important than a visit to a dentist. - George Bernard Shaw

It's a funny relationship that makeup artists have. I always feel kind of like a dentist. People look at me and think of pain. - Rick Baker

I had very good dentures once. Some magnificent gold work. It's the only form of jewelry a man can wear that women fully appreciate. - Graham Greene

Zipper: Two rows of unsmiling teeth that often induce laughter in others, especially when inadvertently left open following a trip to the john - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am keeping with tradition today. After I learned of my Golden Globe nomination, I went to the dentist, so today, let's make it the orthodontist. - Frankie Muniz


Tip Generator

Waiting For Windows To Boot

So Close

Pork Chops

Brazilian Covid

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Nothing Wrong Picture

Cook Ring

Zipperhead

Politicians Be Like

Bridge Uplift

Beach Drag

Do Not Feed The Bears

Does Your Hedgehog Bite?

A Woman's Mind

Spaghetti Starter

Sidewalk Pickpocket

Wing Wedding

Relaxing Surgery

Fish Injuries

Nuclear Waste Truck

Rock Watcher

Frog Waltz

Filling The Water Truck