Cutting Off Board

Tacos are the food of genius. - Heather Brewer

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

Food tastes better when you wear it. - Erin Dealey

It's okay to play with your food. - Emeril Lagasse

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: eat out. - Phyllis Diller

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

Laughter is brightest in the place where the food is. - Ireland Proverb

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on? - George Carlin

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. - Steven Wright

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Fang drops so much food on his ties we keep them in the refrigerator. - Phyllis Diller

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. - Miles Kington

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew. - Herb Caen

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel but not in the kitchen. - George Bernard Shaw

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

I need to tone up, as I eat a lot of fast food. I love Maccy D's, Subway and Domino's. - Amy Childs

The beauty of the world has two edges, one of laughter, one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder. - Virginia Woolf

In the words of Harry S. Truman, "If it's too hot in the kitchen, stay away from the cook." - Archie Bunker

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

No matter what the recipe, any baker can do wonders in the kitchen with some good ingredients and an upbeat attitude. - Buddy Valastro

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

Whenever I have a spare second, I'm in the kitchen whipping up a batch of cookies. I make a mean batch of chocolate chippers. - Karlie Kloss

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli