Circumcision Without Paining

I told you I was sick. - B.P. Roberts

Physician, heal thyself. - Luke 4:23

Sickness soaks the purse. - International Proverb

Quack: A duck's Doctor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Grief is itself a medicine. - William Cowper

Diabetes taught me discipline. - Sonia Sotomayor

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I think I can wipe out diabetes. - Robert Atkins

A young doctor makes a humpy graveyard. - English Proverb

The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard

Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. - Haruki Murakami

The best doctor gives the least medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Fashion saves a lot more lives than doctors. - Bruno Gehard

The doctors X-rayed my head an found nothing. - Dizzy Dean

God is a concept by which we measure our pain. - John Lennon

Leaders don't inflict pain; they share pain. - Max Depree

The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

My doctor tells me I got a communications disease. - Archie Bunker

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb

Laughter is the tonic, the relief, the surcease for pain. - Charlie Chaplin

A sweating ovary or a sick prostate explains most history. - Martin H. Fischer

What do we need a psychiatrist for? We know our kid is nuts. - Homer Simpson

If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin

No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish. - Kin Hubbard

Medicine sometimes snatches away health, sometimes gives it. - Ovid

Trips to the dentist - I like to postpone that kind of thing. - Johnny Depp

Psychiatrist: an M.D. who can't stand the sight of blood. - Unknown

How much pain have cost us the evils that have never happened. - Thomas Jefferson

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. - Samuel Goldwyn

Be kind to your dentist because he has "fillings" too. - Unknown

Cavity: Empty space ready to be stuffed with dentist's bills. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The more you get past pain, the more it goes from coal to diamond. - Jodi Picoult

There is no curing a sick man who believes himself to be in health. - Henri Amiel

Pleasure of love lasts but a moment. Pain of love lasts a lifetime. - Bette Davis

Operation: A surgical job taking minutes to do and years to describe - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Suicide doesn't end the pain. It just passes it on to someone else. - James Kirkup

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

I wanted to be a brain surgeon, but I had a bad habit of dropping things. - Gilbert Gottfried

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb

We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist. - Joseph Heller

The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel

Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased - thus do we refute entropy. - Spider Robinson

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh

He's the best physician that knows the worthlessness of the most medicines. - Benjamin Franklin

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it. - J K Rowling

The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift

Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"? - George Carlin

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. - Phyllis Diller

Poisons and medicine are oftentimes the same substance given with different intents. - Peter Mere Latham

First the Doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me. - Steve Martin

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

I'm having difficulty getting the doctors around here to sign the appropriate form. - Spike Milligan

Life is not over because you have diabetes. Make the most of what you have, be grateful. - Dale Evans

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings. - Laurence J Peter

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. - Erma Bombeck

Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley

A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Dentist: a prestidigitator who, putting metal into your mouth, pulls coin out of your pocket. - Ambrose Bierce

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

You can judge your age by the amount of pain you feel when you come in contact with a new idea. - Pearl S. Buck

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. - C S Lewis

My physician has become warden of my medically imprisoned body, pharmaceuticals the bars on my cell. - Grey E. Livingston

Diabetes is a great example whereby, giving the patient the tools, you can manage yourself very well. - Clayton Christensen

The only equipment lack in the modern hospital? Somebody to meet you at the entrance with a handshake! - Martin H. Fischer

To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill. - Johnny Carson

I love being married. I was single for a long time, and I just got so sick of finishing my own sentences. - Brian Kiley

God loves us too much to leave us alone to contend with the pain, guilt and loneliness of our present life. - Josh McDowell

Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine

My heart, which is so full to overflowing, has often been solaced and refreshed by music when sick and weary. - Martin Luther

Pain is a sign that we are alive. Problems are a sign that we are strong. Prayer is a sign that we are not alone. - Unknown

'Tis not always in a physician's power to cure the sick; at times the disease is stronger than trained art. - Ovid

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden

The doctor may also learn more about the illness from the way the patient tells the story than from the story itself. - James B. Herrick

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

The pain you feel today is the strength you feel tomorrow. For every challenge encountered there is opportunity for growth. - Unknown

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

The art of healing comes from nature, not from the physician. Therefore the physician must start from nature, with an open mind. - Paracelsus

A physician is obligated to consider more than a diseased organ, more even than the whole man - he must view the man in his world. - Harvey Cushing

Once in your life you need a doctor, a lawyer, a policeman, and a preacher... but every day, three times a day, you need a farmer. - Brenda Schaepp

I went to the doctor because I'd swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills. My doctor told me to have a few drinks and get some rest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Do something everyday that you don't want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain. - Mark Twain

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed. - James Thurber

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman

The physician should look upon the patient as a besieged city and try to rescue him with every means that art and science place at his command. - Alexander of Tralles

There are two ways you can get through pain. You can let it destroy you, or you can use it as fuel to drive you: to dream bigger, to work harder. - Taylor Swift

In other industries, value is defined by the ultimate stakeholder - the one who benefits, or not, from the service. We should do the same in medicine. - Dave deBronkart