#1 humor site on the 'net

Burnt Beer

A better alternative to burnt offerings at home

Burnt Beer thanks to Keith Blake

Is your life the Schlitz?

QuotaBills
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King

Burn rubber, not your soul, baby. - Craig Fernandez

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

It's better to burn out than fade away. - Neil Young

Emperor Negro, who fiddled while Rome burned. - Archie Bunker

If stress burned calories, I'd be a supermodel. - Unknown

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

I love super crispy, almost burned, snapping-crispy bacon. - David Lynch

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

Stay up and really burn the midnight oil. There are no compromises. - Leontyne Price

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn. - David Russell

Wouldn't exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? - Bill Murray

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

I shall make electricity so cheap that only the rich can afford to burn candles. - Thomas Edison

The summer movies are coming out! My advice: just stay home and burn a good book. - Stephen Colbert

The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth. - African Proverb

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn? - Bob Hope

America is a melting pot; the people at the bottom get burned while all the scum floats to the top. - Charlie King

"Burn everything British," he once advised his Irish countrymen, "except their coal." - Jonathan Swift

Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work in hand. The Sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus. - Alexander Graham Bell

I wanted to be the first woman to burn her bra, but it would have taken the fire department four days to put it out. - Dolly Parton

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

What progress we are making. In the Middle Ages they would have burned me. Now they are content with burning my books. - Sigmund Freud

Once in seven years I burn all my sermons; for it is a shame if I cannot write better sermons now than I did seven years ago. - John Wesley

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha

The diamond which shines in the Saviour's crown shall burn in unquenched beauty at last on the forehead of every human soul. - Theodore Parker

When your heart is broken, your boats are burned: nothing matters any more. It is the end of happiness and the beginning of peace. - George Bernard Shaw

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry


Argentina Weather Stone

Wurst Humour

Bacon My Heart

Ogre Tree

Swing By The Beach

Amsterdam Dress

Dog Pot Nap

Shame On All You Hunters

Transparent Touch Calculator

Jet Nozzles

Cord Chewing

Surreal Cubist

Painting The Center Line

Names of the Colours

At Home Grave

Boatload Interception

Shadow Seats

Alice In Hulaland

French Army Knife

Putting Your Foot Down

Chicken Rider

ManHole

Hurricane Irene

Day At The Beach