Broken Window Repair

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Set wide the window. Let me drink the day. - Edith Wharton

A window of opportunity won't open itself. - Dave Weinbaum

A Chicken in Every Pot and a Car in Every Garage - Herbert Hoover

Unbrella: An umbrella that the wind has turned inside-out - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

The shortest distance between two points is usually under repair. - Unknown

If a window of opportunity appears, don't pull down the shade. - Tom Peters

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

I'm an emotional eater. When I get upset, my diet goes out the window. - Kelly Osbourne

I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning. - Rodney Dangerfield

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

If you fall out of that window and break both your legs, don't come running to me. - Groucho Marx

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

HonkoSecond: The time between the light turning green and the sound from the car horn behind you - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Stop the words now. Open the window in the center of your chest and let the spirits fly in and out. - Rumi

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain. - Robert Frost

Don't waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window - or break down a door. - Brooke Shields

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

Trying to predict the future is like trying to drive down a country road at night with no lights while looking out the back window. - Peter F Drucker

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

I was born by Caesarian section... but not so you'd notice. It's just that when I leave a house, I go out through the window. - Steven Wright

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with the window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open. - George Bernard Shaw

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

For the past 10 years, corporations have been trained that they should use all the different media. But the Internet is becoming the umbrella. - Larry Weber

It was any outcast's nightmare. If I looked carefully, I suspected I might find it beneath the black paint of the small acrylic by the window. - Nancy Werlin