Anthropomorphic Nouns

Man is by nature a political animal. - Aristotle

Early in the morning when the crows cock. - Archie Bunker

When spiders unite, they can tie down a lion. - Ethiopian Proverb

Why buy a cow if you can get the milk for free. - English Proverb

One man's goose is another man's dander. - Archie Bunker

Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to. - Mark Twain

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

When spiderwebs unite, they can halt even the lion. - African Proverb

I was born a jackdaw - why should I try to be an owl? - Ogden Nash

The lion is ashamed, it's true, when he hunts with the fox. - Gotthold E. Lessing

There is no distinctly American criminal class - except Congress. - Mark Twain

Mrs. O'Leary's cow is sorry, but Cleveland burned anyway. - Archie Bunker

It was so windy that one of our chickens laid the same egg four times. - Unknown

Can grave and formal pass for wise,
When Men the solemn Owl despise? - Benjamin Franklin

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. - WC Fields

A goose flies by a chart the Royal Geographical Society could not improve. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

There's a good animal show on with that kindly old gent, Marlons Perkos. - Archie Bunker

Yesterday I told a chicken to cross the road. It said, "what for?" - Steven Wright

I love my squirrel and dumplings, but you can make it with chicken and dumplings. - Kay Robertson

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. - Woody Allen

An army of deer led by a lion is more to be feared than an army of lions led by a deer. - Philip II

And they bought an Owl, and a useful Cart,
And a pound of Rice, and a Cranberry Tart. - Edward Lear

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

A racehorse is an animal that can take several thousand people for a ride at the same time. - Marjorie Johnson

I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry

Vegetarians are cool. All I eat are vegetarians, except for the occasional mountain lion steak. - Ted Nugent

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself. - Mark Twain

The difference between death and taxes is death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. - Will Rogers

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland

When they see me holding fish, they can see that I am comfortable with kings as well as with paupers. - Imelda Marcos

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Do not trap yourself into an owl's hooting sound
Where sad nights linger through the blackness of a hound - Munia Khan

There are a zillion variables to a hamburger. What part of the animal went into it. What coarseness. What temperature. - Danny Meyer

I am sometimes a fox and sometimes a lion. The whole secret of government lies in knowing when to be the one or the other. - Napoleon Bonaparte

The most dangerous person of the world is a member of the United States Congress just home from a three-day fact-finding trip. - Johnny Isakson

For almost seventy years the life insurance industry has been a smug sacred cow feeding the public a steady line of sacred bull. - Ralph Nader

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Man is the only animal who enjoys the consolation of believing in a next life; all other animals enjoy the consolation of not worrying about it. - Robert Brault

Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the rest of your life. - Groucho Marx