Volunteer Fire Fighter

Too clever is dumb. - Ogden Nash

There are no dumb customers. - Peter F Drucker

Love is being stupid together. - Paul Valery

Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal. - Leo Tolstoy

Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run. - Unknown

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

The buffalo is a surprisingly stupid animal. - Ellsworth Huntington

Put the ladder over before you jump overboard. - Unknown

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

You can't fix stupid - not even with duct tape. - Unknown

Humankind's ladder to God is a ladder of deeds. - Sholem Asch

In skating over thin ice our safety is in our speed. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. - George Bernard Shaw

I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones. - Unknown

I was deaf and dumb and blind to all but me, myself and I. - Loretta Young

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Living with a conscience is like driving a car with the brakes on. - Budd Schulberg

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

Men are born ignorant, not stupid. They are made stupid by education. - Bertrand Russell

The early bird would never catch the worm if the dumb worm slept late. - Milton Berle

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid. - Hedy Lamarr

You will see that it is easier to go down the social ladder than to climb it. - Albert Camus

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

Books are as useful to a stupid person as a mirror is useful to a blind person. - Chanakya

I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid. - Dorothy Parker

Do not be afraid to ask dumb questions; they are easier to handle than dumb mistakes. - Unknown

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered. - Voltaire

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. - Bill Cosby

When you get on the boat that's saving you, don't pull up the ladder behind you. - Adrienne Clarkson

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. - George Carlin

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

You might be a nurse if you firmly believe that "too stupid to live" should be a diagnosis. - Unknown

I think the shocking thing to discover is the owls are not stupid and very feral, very hard to train. - Robbie Coltrane

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive, but do not forget. - Thomas Szasz

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

We're all trying to keep up in this stupid race. But that won't be much fun when we're floating in space. - John Symeou

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

The fundamental cause of trouble in the world is that the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt. - Bertrand Russell

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity there ain't nothing can beat teamwork. - Mark Twain

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don't have a plan. - Larry Winget

A hat should be taken off when you greet a lady, and left off for the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. - P.J. O'Rourke

If one can only see things according to one's own belief system, one is destined to become virtually deaf, dumb, and blind. - Robert A. Wilson

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

The talk you hear about adapting to change is not only stupid, it's dangerous. The only way you can manage change is to create it. - Peter F Drucker

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

In this industry, there are only two ways up the ladder. Rung by rung or claw your way to the top. It's sure been tough on my nails. - Jack Nicholson

These are stupid people that say, "Oh didn't Trump declare bankruptcy? Didn't he go bankrupt?" I didn't go bankrupt. - Donald Trump

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy