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Love is being stupid together. - Paul Valery

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Though patrician, he was also stupid. - Greek Proverb

I can't brain today. I have the dumb. - Unknown

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

My alone time is for everyone's safety. - Unknown

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

You can't cure stupid, but you can sedate it. - Unknown

Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. - John Wayne

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid. - George Bernard Shaw

I was deaf and dumb and blind to all but me, myself and I. - Loretta Young

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Safety Belt: The one you don't drink before driving home - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid. - Hedy Lamarr

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

Leaders don't set out to climb the ladder. They rise by lifting others up. - Jo Miller

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

She's the kind of woman who climbed the ladder of success - wrong by wrong. - Mae West

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

You don't have to be smart to laugh at farts, but you have to be stupid not to. - Louis C.K.

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well-mannered. - Voltaire

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. - Bill Cosby

When you get on the boat that's saving you, don't pull up the ladder behind you. - Adrienne Clarkson

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. - George Carlin

Women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. - George Carlin

They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times. - Tim Allen

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it. - Sam Levenson

Human beings can always be relied upon to exert, with vigor, their God-given right to be stupid. - Dean Koontz

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

Although I am not stupid, the mathematical side of my brain is like dumb notes upon a damaged piano. - Margot Asquith

I think the shocking thing to discover is the owls are not stupid and very feral, very hard to train. - Robbie Coltrane

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid. - Jane Austen

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side. - Joseph Addison

The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive, but do not forget. - Thomas Szasz

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

The fundamental cause of trouble in the world is that the stupid are cocksure while the intelligent are full of doubt. - Bertrand Russell

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity there ain't nothing can beat teamwork. - Mark Twain

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don't have a plan. - Larry Winget

If one can only see things according to one's own belief system, one is destined to become virtually deaf, dumb, and blind. - Robert A. Wilson

If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions? - Scott Adams

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

The talk you hear about adapting to change is not only stupid, it's dangerous. The only way you can manage change is to create it. - Peter F Drucker

In this industry, there are only two ways up the ladder. Rung by rung or claw your way to the top. It's sure been tough on my nails. - Jack Nicholson

You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering, stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them. - Dylan Moran

These are stupid people that say, "Oh didn't Trump declare bankruptcy? Didn't he go bankrupt?" I didn't go bankrupt. - Donald Trump

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. - Sloan Wilson

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright