#1 humor site on the 'net

United Procrastinators

Signs of an almost-well-disciplined organization

United Procrastinators thanks to Howard Chapman

We'll get it done... eventually

QuotaBills
Light tomorrow with today. - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow. - Steven Wright

Rabbit: Hare today, mink tomorrow - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

After all, tomorrow is another day! - Gone with the Wind

And in today already walks tomorrow. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

I have not yet begun to procrastinate. - Unknown

Tomorrow do thy worst, I have lived today. - John Dryden

To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow. - Audrey Hepburn

Fools look to tomorrow; wise men use tonight. - Scottish Proverb

Tomorrow is often the busiest time of the year. - Spanish Proverb

Tomorrow is only found in the calendar of fools. - Og Mandino

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today. - Thomas Jefferson

Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you may diet. - Unknown

Tomorrow doesn't matter for I have lived today. - Horace

No date on the calendar is as important as tomorrow. - Roy W Howard

The choice you make today will usually affect tomorrow. - Unknown

Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one. - Dr. Seuss

Tomorrow hopes we have learned something from yesterday. - John Wayne

It is thrifty to prepare today for the wants of tomorrow. - Aesop

What if there was no tomorrow? There wasn't one today. - Unknown

The world of the future is in our making. Tomorrow is now. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. - Dale Carnegie

If you ride like there's no tomorrow, there won't be. - Unknown

The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life. - George Carlin

One of the greatest labor-saving inventions of today is tomorrow. - Vincent T. Foss

I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever. - Unknown

Every day do something that will inch you closer to a better tomorrow. - Doug Firebaugh

This is the best day the world has ever seen. Tomorrow will be better. - R.A. Campbell

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have seen yesterday and I love today. - William Allen White

Who knows whether the gods will add tomorrow to the days already passed? - Horace

Yesterday is ashes; tomorrow wood. Only today does the fire burn brightly. - Eskimo Proverb

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - Mahatma Gandhi

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well. - Mark Twain

When you accept who you are today, you can create who you want to be tomorrow. - Unknown

Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin. - Mother Teresa

We are so scared of being judged that we look for every excuse to procrastinate. - Erica Jong

Never let a day pass that you will have cause to say, I will do better tomorrow. - Brigham Young

One should really use the camera as though tomorrow you'd be stricken blind. - Dorothea Lange

Work as if you were to live a hundred years. Pray as if you were to die tomorrow. - Benjamin Franklin

All the great opportunities of life are opportunities of today and not of tomorrow. - Clarence E Macartney

Learn as if you were going to live forever. Live as if you were going to die tomorrow. - Mahatma Gandhi

You can't have a better tomorrow if you are thinking about yesterday all the time. - Charles F. Kettering

Yesterday is a cancelled check. Today is cash on the line. Tomorrow is a promissory note. - Hank Stram

You are younger today than you ever will be again. Make use of it for the sake of tomorrow. - Unknown

Yesterday is a canceled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is ready cash - use it. - Kay Lyons

No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination: never put off until tomorrow what you can do today. - Lord Chesterfield

It's difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope for tomorrow. - Robert H. Goddard

Just do your best today and tomorrow will come - tomorrow's going to be a busy day, a happy day. - Helen Boehm

Never do today what you can do tomorrow. Something may occur to make you regret your premature action. - Aaron Burr

You are today where your thoughts have brought you. You will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you. - James Allen

If you're willing to do today what others won't, you can perform tomorrow like others can't. - Jim Brogan

Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning. - Albert Einstein

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present. - Bil Keane

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, Just wait. - Judy Tenuta

My parents have been visiting me for a few days. I just dropped them off at the airport. They leave tomorrow. - Margaret Smith

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today, because if you enjoy it today, you can do it again tomorrow. - Unknown

I went to the bank and reviewed my savings. I found out I have all the money I'll ever need if I die tomorrow. - Henny Youngman

If you do the things today that others won't do, you will have the things tomorrow that others won't have. - Les Brown

I am not afraid of tomorrow, for I have survived the storm of yesterday and that has made me so grateful for today. - Unknown

There is no medicine like hope, no incentive so great, and no tonic so powerful as expectation of something tomorrow. - Orison Swett Marden

Yesterday is a cancelled check; tomorrow is a promissory note; today is the only cash you have - so spend it wisely. - Unknown

Albert Schweitzer's philosophy is that a sick, miserable African of today can be a strong healthy cannibal tomorrow. - Joe E Lewis

The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today. Let us move forward with strong and active faith. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow. - Mary A Radmacher

Every pessimist who ever lived has been buried in an unmarked grave. Tomorrow has always been better than today, and it always will be. - Paul Harvey

Drink and dance and laugh and lie,
Love, the reeling midnight through,
For tomorrow we shall die!
(But, alas, we never do.) - Dorothy Parker

Fantasy has a dark side to it. It also has a light hemisphere - the power of the human imagination to keep going, to imagine a better tomorrow. - Tim O'Brien

I am not afraid of tomorrow for I have seen yesterday, I have today and I know Him who holds tomorrow so I know tomorrow will be beautiful for me. - Jaachynma N.E. Agu

Things always get better. Tomorrow will always be better. Just think about it... is there any time in history in which you'd rather live than now? - Paul Harvey


Topping The Charts

Ring Leader

Edible Rubik's Cube

If Apple Made A Car

High-Wire Act Violin

Redneck Pole Support

New iPhone - Special Delivery

QR Code Quilt

How It's Done

Animal Puns

Feather Fashion

Breast Cancer Cure

Monday Flowers

Dog Muzzle

Cocklebiddy Welcome

Tartan Headphones

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Croatian Landscaping

Help For Dead Children

Sand Carpet

Big Foot Returns to The Screen

Texas Rims

Raised By Owls

Eiffel Slide