Ultimate Breakup

Marriage is heaven and hell. - German Proverb

Civilized humanical relationships - Archie Bunker

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Life is a relationship between molecules. - Linus Pauling

Always say no, and you will never by married. - French Proverb

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

Second Marriage: The triumph of hope over experience. - Samuel Johnson

Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb

The proper basis for marriage is mutual misunderstanding. - Oscar Wilde

There is no perfect marriage, for there are no perfect men. - French Proverb

I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. - Oedipus Rex

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

Before you marry keep both eyes open; after marriage shut one. - Jamaican Proverb

I would rather be a beggar and single than a queen and married. - Queen Elizabeth I

I'll never forget my wedding day... they threw vitamin pills. - Groucho Marx

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. - Unknown

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest. - Irwin Corey

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck. - WC Fields

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

Today couples live together until they learn to detest one another. Then they get married. - G K Chesterton

I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. - Lewis Grizzard

If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife. - Ann Landers

A true relationship is when you can tell each other anything and everything. No secrets, no lies. - Unknown

The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde

My husband always felt that a marriage and career don't mix. That's why he's never worked. - Phyllis Diller

It is not your love that sustains the marriage, but from now on, the marriage that sustains your love. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

Grandchildren don't make a man feel old; it's the knowledge that he's married to a grandmother. - G Norman Collie

It's a funny thing that when a man hasn't anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. - Robert Frost

There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about. - Oscar Wilde

I think hearts are very much like glasses - if they do not break with the first ring, they usually last a considerable time. - Letitia Landon

Piano playing is more difficult than statesmanship. It is harder to awake emotions in ivory keys than it is in human beings. - Ignace Jan Paderewski

A sibling may be the keeper of one's identity, the only person with the keys to one's unfettered, more fundamental self. - Marian Sandmaier

Getting married is easy. Staying married is more difficult. Staying happily married for a lifetime should rank among the fine arts. - Roberta Flack

In this year, King Aethelstan, Lord of Warriors, ring-giver to men... won eternal glory, in battle with sword edges, around Brunaburh. - Unknown

There are all kinds of ways for a relationship to be tested, even broken, some, irrevocably; it's the endings we're unprepared for. - Katherine Owen