Texas Wal-Mart Shopper

Window Shopping: Eye browsing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Leave the gun, take the cannoli. - The Godfather

These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola

The people of Texas want us to secede! - William Clements

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

Eyebrows: What I do when I go shopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can always tell a Texan, but not much. - Unknown

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics. - Molly Ivins

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

I'm super laid back. I'm from Texas. I love my family. - Selena Gomez

The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.' - Kinky Friedman

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans. - George Carlin

We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. - Red Skelton

News events are like Texas weather. If you don't like it, wait a minute. - Jessica Savitch

Texas has yet to learn submission to any oppression, come from what source it may. - Sam Houston

How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design? - Kinky Friedman

Being from Texas, I would say I favor a pair of jeans you can wear some boots with. - Jensen Ackles

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

Like trying a man's finger for having pulled the trigger of a gun which murdered someone. - Malcolm Muggeridge

I'm from Texas, and one of the reasons I like Texas is because there's no one in control. - Willie Nelson

Most of my memories of Texas are of mosquitoes, watermelons, crickets, and my brother teasing me. - Robin Wright

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

Bond reflected that good Americans were fine people and that most of them seemed to come from Texas. - Ian Fleming

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

The policemen or soldiers are only a gun in the establishments hand. They make the racist secure in his racism. - Huey Newton

To an entrepreneur, closing a financing often feels like the end of a marathon. It's actually the starting gun. - Andy Dunn

Only think of two things - the gun and the tape. When you hear the one, just run like hell until you break the other. - Sam Mussabini

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. - P G Wodehouse

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

I come bearing an olive branch in one hand, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not let the olive branch fall from my hand. - Yasser Arafat

Gun control? We need bullet control. I think every bullet should cost $5,000. Because if a bullet cost $5,000, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders. - George Carlin