#1 humor site on the 'net

Super Bowl Lunch

Getting ready for a Super Bowl tailgate party

Super Bowl Lunch thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Half time entertainment at the NFL Super Bowl

Super Bowl Lunch thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Super Bowl Lunch thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Who took the cork out of my lunch? - WC Fields

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

Wrestlers are a bunch of wanna-be football players. - Brian Bosworth

Foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs. - Mitch Hedberg

Out for lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also. - Unknown

Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become. - Mary McGrory

I played a little basketball. Some football in junior high. - Clint Eastwood

Football is a game designed to keep coal miners off the streets. - Jimmy Breslin

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. - Shelley Winters

It is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football. - John Heisman

Ask not what you can do for your country, ask what's for lunch. - Orson Welles

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince, and dinner like a pauper. - Adelle Davis

All I know most surely about morality and obligations, I owe to football. - Albert Camus

I never drink coffee at lunch - I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. - Ronald Reagan

Was Uncle Oscar's death very untimely, you ask? Well, it was near lunch. - Archie Bunker

The most important question in American cinema is "When is lunch?" - Tommy Lee Jones

The calendar and the clock are all set by football season and the off-season. - Tom Coughlin

I believe in Coach Louis Wong. He is so much more than just a football coach. - Stephen Covey

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. - Erma Bombeck

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

So like any football or basketball coach, you always believe you're going to win. - Colin Powell

In life, as in football, you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are. - Arnold H Glasgow

My body is like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I don't think about it, I just have it. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing. - Shaquille O'Neal

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

A man may be a pessimistic determinist before lunch, and an optimistic believer in the will's freedom after it. - Aldous Huxley

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote. - Benjamin Franklin

Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally. - Alfred Hitchcock

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? - Jim Bouton

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

I listened to a football coach who spoke straight from the shoulder - at least I could detect no higher origin in anything he said. - Dixon R Fox

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy


Tartan Treasures

Dog Download

Your First Motorcycle

Summer Snack

Box Car

Frog Food

The Good Old Days

Towel Dog

Night Shift for a Computer Geek

Battery Update

Russian Beach

How To Improve New Orleans

Drone Crossing

Air Guitar

Fly Art

Texas Rain Gauge

Camel Hatchback

Teahouse of the August Moon

Bent Baby

Deluxembourg

Lost Head

Moving Sofa

Florida Golf Hazard

Billionaire Thoughts