Super Bowl Lunch

Who took the cork out of my lunch? - WC Fields

Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch. - WC Fields

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

I don't believe in dining on an empty stomach. - WC Fields

Life is a rollercoaster. Try to eat a light lunch. - David A. Schmaltz

Wrestlers are a bunch of wanna-be football players. - Brian Bosworth

Foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs. - Mitch Hedberg

Out for lunch. If not back by five, out for dinner also. - Unknown

Baseball is what we were, football is what we have become. - Mary McGrory

I played a little basketball. Some football in junior high. - Clint Eastwood

Whenever you want to marry someone, go have lunch with his ex-wife. - Shelley Winters

It is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football. - John Heisman

Ask not what you can do for your country, ask what's for lunch. - Orson Welles

All I know most surely about morality and obligations, I owe to football. - Albert Camus

I never drink coffee at lunch - I find it keeps me awake for the afternoon. - Ronald Reagan

Was Uncle Oscar's death very untimely, you ask? Well, it was near lunch. - Archie Bunker

The most important question in American cinema is "When is lunch?" - Tommy Lee Jones

The calendar and the clock are all set by football season and the off-season. - Tom Coughlin

I believe in Coach Louis Wong. He is so much more than just a football coach. - Stephen Covey

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. - Erma Bombeck

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

In life, as in football, you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are. - Arnold H Glasgow

My body is like breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I don't think about it, I just have it. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet. - Phyllis Diller

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing. - Shaquille O'Neal

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings. - George Will

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

A man may be a pessimistic determinist before lunch, and an optimistic believer in the will's freedom after it. - Aldous Huxley

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote. - Benjamin Franklin

Kicking is very important in football. In fact, some of the more enthusiastic players even kick the ball, occasionally. - Alfred Hitchcock

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

I listened to a football coach who spoke straight from the shoulder - at least I could detect no higher origin in anything he said. - Dixon R Fox

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy