Someone Stole A Cracker

I hid myself in food. - Gordon Ramsay

Procrastination is the thief of time. - Edward Young

Steal the hog, and give the feet for alms. - George Herbert

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

When the cat's away, the mice will play. - French Proverb

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying - dead. - Oscar Wilde

Education is hanging around until you've caught on. - Robert Frost

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known. - Walt Disney

Mouse: An animal which strews its path with fainting women. - Ambrose Bierce

That picture with Lon Chaney - "Of Mouse And Men." - Archie Bunker

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. - Steven Wright

Time is a vindictive bandit to steal the beauty of our former selves. - Raphael

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

My uncle is in trouble with his union. They caught him working on the job. - Joey Adams

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back. - Woody Allen

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. - Steven Wright

What else is there to live for? Chinese food and women. There is nothing else! - Dudley Moore

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

I took a physical for some life insurance. All they would give me was fire and theft. - Milton Berle

Sorry for being late. I got caught up enjoying my last few minutes of not being here. - Unknown

The trouble with eating Italian food is that five or six days later, you're hungry again. - George Miller

If you steal from one author, it's plagiarism; if you steal from many, it's research. - Wilson Mizner

A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return. - Jewish Proverb

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

By eating many fruits and vegetables in place of fast food and junk food, people could avoid obesity. - David H Murdock

Most fat food is fried. Fried food tastes great, and people don't seem to care about the fat aspect. - Eric Schlosser

Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation. - Homer Simpson

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter? - Woody Allen

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

I'll never forget my first fur. It was a modest little stole. Modest? People thought I was wearing anchovies. - Phyllis Diller

Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray

Did Lincoln apologize to Alexander Graham Booth? Did you ever hear of scruples? I think Boom Boom caught 'em from a Chinaman. - Archie Bunker

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell