Santa Bikers

Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

Midnight bugs taste best. - Unknown

The perfect man? A poet on a motorcycle. - Lucinda Williams

The best alarm clock is sunshine on chrome. - Unknown

When you're riding lead, don't spit. - Unknown

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown

Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul. - Unknown

Bikes don't leak oil, they mark their territory. - Unknown

If you ride like there's no tomorrow, there won't be. - Unknown

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

Have fun, be active. Ride a bike instead of driving, for example. - Dan Buettner

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

An intellectual is a man who doesn't know how to park his bike. - Spiro T. Agnew

It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed. - Unknown

What do you call a cyclist who doesn't wear a helmet? An organ donor. - David Perry

That's all the motorcycle is, a system of concepts worked out in steel. - Robert M. Pirsig

Sometimes the best communication happens when you're on separate bikes. - Unknown

Life may begin at 30, but it doesn't get real interesting until about 150. - Unknown

Keep your bike in good repair: motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking. - Unknown

I'm paranoid about everything. On my stationary bike I have a rearview mirror. - Richard Lewis

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Most motorcycle problems are caused by the nut that connects the handlebars to the saddle. - Unknown

Catching a yellow-jacket in your shirt at seventy miles per hour can double your vocabulary. - Unknown

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness. - Emo Philips

People are more violently opposed to fur than leather because it's safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs. - Unknown

You're the guy that'll be sneaking out of your bedroom at three o'clock in the morning to look at your bike. - Paul Teutul

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz