Redneck Car Movie Screen

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

When I was your age, television was called books. - William Goldman

Television proves that sight has a definite odor. - Gerald F Lieberman

Goat Herder: A person who likes to work with kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bed is like the womb, only drier and with better TV reception. - Linda Richman

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

TV is simply a place where people go when they get tired of thinking. - Kevin Devitte

Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. - Red Buttons

Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television. - David Letterman

I think Les Moonves is the most highly overrated person in television. - Donald Trump

Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV. - Jerry Seinfeld

Being an actor on a movie set is like going to the playground at recess. - Melissa Leo

So long as there's a jingle in your head, television isn't free. - Jason Love

I'd like to be the ideal mother, but I'm too busy raising my kids. - Unknown

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television. - Victoria Wood

Couch Potato: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson

In the successful organization, no detail is too small to escape close attention. - Lou Holtz

So many people are on television that don't know me, and they're like experts on me. - Donald Trump

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. - Laurence J Peter

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

The majesty of faith is that it teaches us to see what exists, not merely what catches our attention. - Jonathan Sacks

When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world. - George Washington Carver

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

There is no such thing as an attention span. People have infinite attention if you are entertaining them. - Jerry Seinfeld

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of the television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. - Johnny Carson

Well, once I did 'Grease,' everyone was offering me studio pictures in a similar vein - you know, popcorn movie. - Randal Kleiser

I'm someone who believes the only way to see a movie is in a big theater, on a big screen, with a big bag of popcorn. - Dan Glickman

We're at a point in history where everyone needs to pay attention to politics. Too much is at stake for us to be apathetic. - Kevin Costner

Having kids - the responsibility of rearing good, kind, ethical, responsible human beings - is the biggest job anyone can embark on. - Maria Shriver

Of all the diversions of life, there is none so proper to fill up its empty spaces as the reading of useful and entertaining authors. - David Viscott

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer