Racial Profiling Starts Early

Police do not belong in war zones. - Daniel K Moran

Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it. - Sigmund Freud

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

No one was ever great without some portion of divine inspiration. - Cicero

Dubm Waiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

Jackpot: When all the kids stay at friends' homes for the night - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bed and Breakfast: Two things the kids will never make for themselves - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Silence is golden unless you have kids. Then silence is just suspicious. - Unknown

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The rest of us just get up and go to work. - Chuck Close

Inspiration at its best means breath, and only too frequently means wind. - G K Chesterton

Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police. - Unknown

Couch Potato: What Mom finds under the sofa cushions after the kids eat dinner - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm not buying my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did. - Yogi Berra

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Enthusiasm is excitement with inspiration, motivation, and a pinch of creativity. - Bo Bennett

Inspiration responds to our attentiveness in various and sometimes unexpected ways. - Wayne W Dyer

Police: The only people who are paid to go around pinching people in the wrong places - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend. - Jack Nicholson

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Having kids is the ultimate job in life. I want to be most successful at being a good father. - Nick Lachey

Success is 1 percent inspiration, 99 percent perspiration, and 2 percent attention to detail. - Phil

I invite everyone to choose forgiveness rather than division, teamwork over personal ambition. - Jean-Francois Cope

A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown

The police feel that most of the public are against them and that there is a lot of bad feeling. - Peter James

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I really do believe that God is love, one of deep affection and grace and forgiveness and inspiration. - William P Young

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

The men who have furnished me with my greatest inspiration have not been men of wealth, but men of deeds. - James C Penney

Inspiration comes unawares, from unaccountable sources that have nothing to do with planning or intelligence. - Maurice Chevalier

Inspiration comes from within yourself. One has to be positive. When you're positive, good things happen. - Deep Roy

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

Don't give up trying to do what you really want to do. Where there is love and inspiration, I don't think you can go wrong. - Ella Fitzgerald

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com