#1 humor site on the 'net

Pencil Shavings

How to whittle a pencil

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

Pencil Shavings thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Art is the most beautiful of lies. - Claude Debussy

I view art as an inspirational tool. - Thomas Kincade

One does not marry art. One ravishes it. - Edgar Degas

All great art comes from a sense of outrage. - Glenn Close

What garlic is to salad, insanity is to art. - Augustus Saint-Gaudens

Ballet is good, because it makes you stand up tall. - Carine Roitfeld

Dancing: The Highest Intelligence in the Freest Body. - Isadora Duncan

The art of teaching is the art of assisting discovery. - Mark Van Doren

The art of living is more like wrestling than dancing. - Marcus Aurelius

Dancing can reveal all the mystery that music conceals. - Charles Baudelaire

Music is the art which is most nigh to tears and memory. - Oscar Wilde

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? - George Carlin

Mathematical genius and artistic genius touch one another. - Gosta Mittag-Leffler

One should either be a work of art, or wear a work of art. - Oscar Wilde

A work of art is the unique result of a unique temperament. - Oscar Wilde

Art is the demonstration that the ordinary is extraordinary. - Amedee Ozenfant

We need a leader that wrote "The Art of the Deal". - Donald Trump

Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to? - George Carlin

The new job of art is to sit on the wall and get more expensive. - Robert Hughes

Art doesn't reproduce the visible but rather makes it visible. - Paul Klee

A painting is never finished — it simply stops in interesting places. - Paul Gardner

The art of leadership is saying no, not yes. It is very easy to say yes. - Tony Blair

Leadership is the art of giving people a platform for spreading ideas that work. - Seth Godin

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. - Scott Adams

Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid. - Walter Winchell

Prophecy: The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery. - Ambrose Bierce

When other little girls wanted to be ballet dancers, I kind of wanted to be a vampire. - Angelina Jolie

Beautiful young people are accidents of nature, but beautiful old people are works of art. - Eleanor Roosevelt

What we have to do, what at any rate it is our duty to do, is to revive the old art of Lying. - Oscar Wilde

Writing is very much a playground - an artistic playground. It's the most fun thing I do. - Shania Twain

I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty. - Bob Hope

Leadership is the art of getting others to want to do something you are convinced should be done. - Vance Packard

The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science. - Albert Einstein

Art is made to disturb. Science reassures. There is only one valuable thin in art: the thing you cannot explain. - Georges Braque

I don't think much of a dance step where the girl looks like she was being carried out of a burning building. - Kin Hubbard

Every happening, great and small, is a parable whereby God speaks to us, and the art of life is to get the message. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht

I don't want to be the oldest performer in captivity. I don't want to look like a little old man dancing out there. - Fred Astaire

The greatest achievement of humanity is not its works of art, science, or technology, but the recognition of its own dysfunction. - Eckhart Tolle

Logic: the art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding. - Ambrose Bierce


Robot Hood

New Nail Gun

Breakthrough - Second Wind

Burma Road Cycling

Water Waste Basket

My Daughter and My Money

Executive Decision Time

Animal Rings

Cow Return

Biggest Fan On The Block

Senior's TV Tray

Potty 'Train'ing In India

A Woman Named Five Horses

Vegan Dentist

How To Conserve Gas

Rolling Shoes

How Twins Are Made

Cool Reading Room

Poor Lifetime

Be GarFul

Tooth Ferry

Ready For Rabbits

Ecosystem

Plumber's Night Light