#1 humor site on the 'net

Open Drive Through

Restaurant creates unique side entrance

Open Drive Through thanks to Keith Blake

Come in while the trunk's open

QuotaBills
Marketing: Lying in loafers - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Homemade dishes drive one from home. - Thomas Hood

Defendit numerus: There is safety in numbers. - Unknown

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. - Unknown

Fancy Restaurant: One that serves cold soup on purpose - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sour Kraut: Unhappy with the fare in the Berlin restaurant - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines? - George Carlin

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Taxi Driver: Worker who earns a living by driving customers away - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-break on. - Maxwell Maltz

The traveler with empty pockets pursues his journey in perfect safety. - Ovid

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

It is sometimes as dangerous to be run into by a microbe as by a trolley car. - J.J. Walsh

Marketing is trying to figure out what people want so you can give it to them. - Shelly Lazarus

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving. - David Letterman

Good marketing makes the company look smart. Great marketing makes the customer feel smart. - Joe Chernov

They say you only go around once, but with a muscle car you can go around two or three times. - Tim Allen

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

Life as pool table,
White is focus,
Others, targets.
Stick is your driving force! - Stricketer

Most of American life is driving somewhere and then driving back wondering why the hell you went. - John Updike

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

Education makes a people easy to lead, but difficult to drive; easy to govern but impossible to enslave. - Henry Brougham

Technology is so much fun but we can drown in our technology. The fog of information can drive out knowledge. - Daniel J Boorstin

Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I went to a fancy French restaurant called "Deja Vu." The headwaiter said, "Don't I know you?" - Steven Wright

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

Good business leaders create a vision, articulate the vision, passionately own the vision, and relentlessly drive it to completion. - Jack Welch

Eating a tuna roll at a sushi restaurant should be considered no more environmentally benign than driving a Hummer or harpooning a manatee. - Daniel Pauly

The rhythm of the footsteps, the sound of whatever is coming down the ladder is driving both me and my mom steadily toward peeing our pants. - Kendare Blake

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. - Sloan Wilson

Approach racing like a game of billiards. If you bash the ball too hard, you get nowhere. As you handle the cue properly, you drive with more finesse. - Juan M Fangio


2022 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Manitoba Kickstand

Puzzle Ad

Winter Driving in Canada

Coffee Morning

Slide-n-Freeze

Slip Sliding Away

Canadian Smart Car

Winter SOS

East Coast Winter Graffiti

Handstand Snowman

We're Not Gonna Take It

Vinyl Richie

Karma Towing

Red Wine Diet

Snow Geese

Family Birthday Reminder

The Circular File

Pair Tree

'Top Down' Snow Removal

Winter Kayaking

Mustache Breeze

Something Positive

Snowstorm Closure