#1 humor site on the 'net

Only The Most Important Parts

When highlighting doesn't help your memory

Only The Most Important Parts thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Life is too important to be taken seriously. - Oscar Wilde

Remember, no matter where you go, there you are. - Earl Mac Rauch

Truth is simple, requiring neither study nor art. - Ammian

The longer the title, the less important the job. - George McGovern

Only time will tell if we stand the test of time. - Van Halen

Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us. - Oscar Wilde

Easter is very important to me, it's a second chance. - Reba McEntire

The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses. - Edith Sodergran

Those who cannot remember the past are destined to repeat it. - George Santayana

Remember that happiness is a way of travel, not a destination. - Roy L. Goodman

If a man's wit be wandering, let him study the mathematics. - Francis Bacon

Courage is very important. Like a muscle, it is strengthened by use. - Ruth Gordon

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use. - Wendell Johnson

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said. - Peter F Drucker

I got something important here to read and sign and I gotta consecrate on that. - Archie Bunker

I wanted to study to be a dental hygienist, marry a rich dentist, and hang it up. - Vicki Lawrence

When you can't remember why you're hurt, that's when you're healed. - Jane Fonda

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and let it come in. - Morrie Schwartz

I study myself more than any other subject. That is my metaphysics, that is my physics, - Michel de Montaigne

Depend on the rabbit's foot if you will, but remember it didn't work for the rabbit. - R.E. Shay

If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today. - E. Joseph Cossman

Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember, and remember more than I have seen. - Benjamin Disraeli

He who devotes 16 hours a day to hard study may become as wise at 60 as he thought himself at 20. - Mary Wilson Little

If a young person has any idealism at all, it's strongest about the time he finishes college. - Sargent Shriver

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. - Abraham Lincoln

If we are made of atoms, then a scientist studying atoms is actually a group of atoms studying themselves. - Unknown

I'm a 3rd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do and 2nd degree in karate, and I'm a licensed bodyguard. - Katheryn Winnick

It's hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty. - George Burns

Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory. - Leonardo da Vinci

Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught. - Oscar Wilde

Don't be distracted by criticism. Remember, the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you. - Zig Ziglar

Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy. - George Carlin

It's really important to stand up for yourself and not always agree with what people say if indeed you don't feel that that's true. - Lily Collins

The fruits of philosophy are the important thing, not the philosophy itself. When we ask the time, we don't want to know how watches are made. - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

If you want people to know how much you care, show them how much you remember. Learn their names and use them often. It's an important skill to develop. - Harvey Mackay

Thus meditating you will no longer strive to build yourself up in your prejudices, but, forgetting self, you will remember only that you are seeking the Truth. - James Allen

Rather than sitting back and letting false statements be published without challenge, I believe it is important to expose irresponsible, malicious and false reporting. - Donald Trump

When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened. - Winston Churchill

There isn't so much to be afraid of, out there. I can remember thinking it was funny to find that out, on the last night of my life; I'd spent the rest of it being afraid of everything. - Nick Hornby

Their memory's like a train: you can see it getting smaller as it pulls away And the things you can't remember Tell the things you can't forget that History puts a saint in every dream. - Tom Waits


World's Greatest Typo

Icehenge

Found It!

Puma Pants

Polar Bear Attack

Foot Sign Language

Winter Tires

Hooters Face Mask

Latte Art

Whiskey Toothpaste

Titanic's Non-Romantic Scene

Fake News

Steep Steps

Better Lawyer

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Snow Detour

No Time For This

Kwik-Mart Math

Croatian Landscaping

Best Fairy Tale

Back In Five Minutes

Winterized Motorcycle

If IKEA Ran GM

Six Hunnit