Morning Paper

A party without cake is just a meeting. - Julia Child

Life is short. Eat cookies for breakfast. - Unknown

What poison is to food, self-pity is to life. - Oliver C. Wilson

You can't hatch chickens from fried eggs. - German Proverb

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

Food tastes best when you eat it with your own spoon. - Denmark Proverb

The food in Yugoslavia is fine if you like pork tartare. - Ed Begley Jr.

Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk? - Steven Wright

Once you get rid of integrity the rest is a piece of cake. - Larry Hagman

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

In some areas I am more noted for reading then I am for cookies. - Wally Amos

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it. - Steven Wright

Chemically speaking, chocolate really is the world's perfect food. - Michael Levine

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing about. - Benjamin Franklin

A great empire, like a great cake, is most easily diminished at the edges. - Benjamin Franklin

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it. - Moses Hadas

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough, but a lousy newspaper is a joy forever. - Garrison Keillor

Marriages are all happy. It's having breakfast together that causes all the trouble. - Irish Proverb

Being kissed by a man who doesn't wax his moustache is like eating an egg without salt. - Rudyard Kipling

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

Breakfast is my favorite meal. I cook a big one for everyone - bacon and eggs. I own a lot of eggcups. - Emily Mortimer

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again, and can take off on your own. - Julia Child

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

If Moses had been paid newspaper rates for the Ten Commandments, he might have written the Two Thousand Commandments. - Isaac B. Singer

A burrito is a delicious food item that breaks down all social barriers and leads to temporary spiritual enlightenment. - Lisi Harrison

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend on reading it. - Groucho Marx

I like simple food, seasoned with just salt, pepper, oil and vinegar. Complicated food and complicated lives are never good. - Sirio Maccioni

Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. - Jimmy Breslin

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

My wife and I tried two or three times in the last 40 years to have breakfast together, but it was so disagreeable we had to stop. - Winston Churchill

How is it that mercury is not safe for food additives and Over the Counter drug products, but it is safe in our vaccines and dental amalgams? - Dan Burton

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump