Men's Golf Rules

All is fair in love and golf. - American Proverb

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Golf, like measles, should be caught young. - P G Wodehouse

Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns. - Unknown

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

Retire to what? I already play golf and fish for a living. - Julius Boros

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

Hold me, grip me, cherish me, pretend that I'm a golf club! - Unknown

The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. - Billy Graham

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Farmers: Men successful only if they sell their farms to golf clubs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five. - Paul Harvey

I don't need to know where the green is. Where is the golf course? - Babe Ruth

One advantage of golf over bowling is that you never lose a bowling ball. - Don Carter

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf. - H L Mencken

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

Golf is the worst drug in the world. You just keep coming back fro more embarrassment. - Deacon Jones

Sometimes the game of golf is just too difficult to endure with a golf club in your hands. - Bobby Jones

One of the quickest ways to meet new people is to pick up the wrong ball on a golf course. - Unknown

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. - Robert Lynd

They say that life is a lot like golf - don't believe them. Golf is a lot more complicated. - Gardner Dickinson

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

I carry a golf ball to put under my feet when they get tight, and a Ther-Band for general stretching. - Jessica Ennis-Hill

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

Golf is like any other sports competition. There is not a whole lot of point to it unless someone suffers. - Kevin Wohl

Give me my golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny

Long ago, when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf. - Unknown

The biggest thing is just routine. I think that's the biggest correlation between golfers and basketball players. - Stephen Curry

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

I still play hockey every now and then, and I still golf. But my biggest exercise is walking my big dog in the park every day. - Michael J. Fox

If Obama resigns from office NOW, thereby doing a great service to the country, I will give him free lifetime golf at any one of my courses. - Donald Trump

I don't know him very well... I've played him at golf and beat him badly both times, and I think that probably had a negative impact on him. - Donald Trump