#1 humor site on the 'net

Maid Confusion

Clearing up who does the housework

Maid Confusion thanks to Mike King

A relationship 'not maid' for him

QuotaBills
The woman that deliberates is lost. - Joseph Addison

A man thinks he knows, but a woman knows better. - Indian Proverb

Waitress: A woman who thinks money grows on trays - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition. - Unknown

A weeping man and a smiling woman are not to be trusted. - Indian Proverb

We're women. We have a double standard to live up to. - Ally McBeal

Clever Woman: One who knows how to give a man her own way - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

I think housework is the reason most women go to the office. - Heloise Cruse

What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce. - Mark Twain

She's loaded with this, waddya call, women's intermission. - Archie Bunker

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. - Charles de Gaulle

As long as she thinks of a man, nobody objects to a woman thinking. - Virginia Woolf

A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him. - Brendan Francis

The best years of a woman's life - the ten years between 39 and 40. - Unknown

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

If thou art a master, sometimes be blind; if a servant, sometimes be deaf. - Thomas Fuller

Coquette: A woman without a heart, who makes a fool of a man who has no head - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

And what is better than wisdom? Woman. And what is better than a good woman? Nothing. - Geoffrey Chaucer

Co-Operation: An exchange between a woman and a man in which she coos and he operates - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her. - Oscar Wilde

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. - Robert Frost

You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and that's not saying much for you. - Groucho Marx

Sewing Circle: 1. Where friendship hangs by a thread; 2. A group of women who needle each other. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

His lordship may compel us to be equal upstairs but there will never be equality in the servants' hall. - James M Barrie

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife. - Groucho Marx

She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman. - Oscar Wilde

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

I think the only difference between me and the other candidates is that I'm more honest and my women are more beautiful. - Donald Trump

He who begins with Metaphysics will not only become confused in matters of religion, but will fall into complete infidelity. - Maimonides

The first responsibility of a leader is to define reality. The last is to say thank you. In between, the leader is a servant. - Max DePree

Silence is interesting. It can show confusion, indifference and sadness. But it can also show determination, confidence and caring. - Maxime Lagace

A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. - Conan O'Brien

I love writing for women. The willingness to go from laughter to tears in a moment is the greatest palette you can paint with as a writer. - Michael P King


Calling In Sick - Snow Job for the Boss

Look At It This Way

Camouflaged Owls

Snow Geese

Quantum Physiques

Typewriter Parts

Irish Flu Shots

Hawaii Scuba Bus

Winter Blues

Pink Freud

Geriatric Flight

Chili Rub

Safety Pin Face

New York's Morning Cup of Java

Pole Position

Before Political Correctness

Tooth Loss

Organic Compromise

Classic Ballet Ad

Redneck Air Conditioning Controls

End Of World Car Sale

Digging Up A Date

Tomato Sprouts

Shuttle Bus Driver