#1 humor site on the 'net

Learn To Cook

Culinary inspiration from alphabet soup

Learn To Cook thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Spelling your way to gourmet dishes

QuotaBills
Fine words do not produce food. - Nigeria Proverb

It's okay to play with your food. - Emeril Lagasse

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - American Saying

Then you add two forkfuls of cooking oil. - The French Chef

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese

Bacon bits are like fairy dust of the food community. - Unknown

Poultry is for the cook what canvas is for the painter. - Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

Food, love, mother and career: the four basic guilt groups. - Cathy Guisewite

I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate. - Julia Child

You are only master of food that you haven't yet eaten. - Tibet Proverb

I'm a terrible cook, but I make very good lobster salad. - Nancy Carell

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

Fang drops so much food on his ties we keep them in the refrigerator. - Phyllis Diller

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick - not wounded - dead. - Woody Allen

Your food is close to your stomach, but you must put it in your mouth first. - African Saying

Advice is like cooking - you should try it first before you feed it to others. - Unknown

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

So long as you have food in your mouth, you have solved all questions for the time being. - Franz Kafka

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion. - Gordon Ramsay

Chocolate symbolizes, as does no other food, luxury, comfort, sensuality, gratification, and love. - Karl Petzke

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside. - Mark Twain

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. - Alex Levine

America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. - Unknown

No matter what the recipe, any baker can do wonders in the kitchen with some good ingredients and an upbeat attitude. - Buddy Valastro

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

The disparity between a restaurant's price and food quality rises in direct proportion to the size of the pepper mill. - Bryan Miller

An expert is like the bottom of a double boiler. It shoots off a lot of steam, but it never really knows what's cooking. - Unknown

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

Reminds me of my safari in Africa. Somebody forgot the corkscrew and for several days we had to live on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. - Red Skelton

One of my biggest fears is that I'm going to die alone in my home, and my cats will eat me because I am too dead to open their food cans. - Kelli Jae Baeli

There is one longing almost as deep and imperious as the desire for food and sleep. It is the desire to be great. It is the desire to be important. - Dale Carnegie


Vibrations

On Short Notice

Octopi

Big Birthday Surprise

Cliff Side Camping

Childhood Obesity

Meccano Shoe

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

OCD Floor Tiles

Wedding Cake for Men

Baby Birth

Chicken Roost

Magnetic Personality

Cold Corners

Swiss Minigun

Underwater Plane

Fire Destroyed

Groj Sale

You May Pet Me

Whatever Time

Cutting Off Board

Car Swarm

We Open

Cloud Computing