#1 humor site on the 'net

I Can Still Kiss You

Little Johnny loved stare contests with the dog

I Can Still Kiss You thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

The mask of true friendship

QuotaBills
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Civilized humanical relationships - Archie Bunker

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

A good bone does not always come to a good dog. - French Proverb

Treasure your relationships, not your possessions. - Anthony J. D'Angelo

A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. - Rupert Brooke

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

The dog who meets with a good master is the happier of the two. - Maurice Maeterlinck

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

I had rather hear my dog bark at a crow, than a man swear he loves me. - William Shakespeare

When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. - H L Mencken

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Find someone who will change your life, not just your relationship status. - Abdul'Rauf Hashmi

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any. - Fred Astaire

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Fang and I are always fighting. When we get up in the morning, we don't kiss; we touch gloves. - Phyllis Diller

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. - Epicurus

If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, 'keep away from children.' - Susan Savannah


Teethbrushes

Dinner Preparation: Here's looking at you!

Picture Perfect

Same Mistake Twice

How To Build A Fence

Horse-Back Riding

Social Distancing Fine

Burnout Indication

Lost Luggage

A Balanced Diet

Bowen Arrow

Business School Basics

Broken Potted Plant Art

Fish Hat

Fairy Soap

Floor Legs

Microscopic Reader

Brief Case

Hairstyle Of The Year

Duck Heist - Ducks Gone Bad

Swan Heels

Windshield Defrogger

Side-Ways

Sonic Straw