I Can Still Kiss You

France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

I go through life like a Karate Kid. - Britney Spears

Great shot kid, that was one in a million. - Han Solo

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

When I was a kid everyone used to call me pork 'n. - Michael Biehn

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime. - Red Skelton

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

Kids are life's only guaranteed bona fide upside surprise. - Jack Nicholson

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. - H L Mencken

Advice is like kissing: it costs nothing and is a pleasant thing to do. - H.W. Shaw

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

When a kid says "smell my hand," it almost never smells like cinnamon. - Brian P. Cleary

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed. - Don Rickles

The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley

This is a Jewish cake - they give this to a Jewish kid before he gets circumscribed. - Archie Bunker

Love and respect are the most important aspects of parenting, and of all relationships. - Jodie Foster

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

The sound of a kiss is not so loud as that of a cannon, but its echo lasts a great deal longer. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul. - Marilyn Monroe

One in four kids have either pre-diabetes or diabetes - what I like to call diabesity. How did this happen? - Mark Hyman

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, "I was just whispering in her mouth". - Groucho Marx

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe

To be a successful father... there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years. - Ernest Hemingway

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

When it comes to hockey, it's been in my blood since I was 3 or 4 years old. I love coaching the kids, especially at that level. - Mario Lemieux

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain