Dog Beer Conversion

France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

In wine, there is the truth. - Pliny the Elder

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. - Benjamin Franklin

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown

In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

A dog is the only thing on this earth that loves you more than he loves himself. - Josh Billings

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain