Cowboy Baby Carrier

Nipper: Baby crab - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Birth patrol pills. - Archie Bunker

Stoic: De boid what brings de babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It takes a whole village to raise a child. - African Proverb

I was with book, as a woman is with child. - C S Lewis

A child's first teacher is its mother. - Peng Liyuan

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

A rich child often sits in a poor mother's lap. - Danish Proverb

There are no premature babies, only delayed weddings. - American Proverb

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on. - Carl Sandburg

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on. - Joan Rivers

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

I look in the mirror through the eyes of the child that was me. - Judy Collins

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm. - Bruce Barton

There is never a problem child; there is only a problem parent. - A.S. Neill

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

No matter how bad a child is, he is still good for a tax deduction. - American Proverb

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

The big lesson in life, baby, is never be scared of anyone or anything. - Frank Sinatra

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action. - Benjamin Disraeli

I love you like crazy, baby
'Cuz I'd go crazy without you. - Pixie Foudre

Baby: a loud noise at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other. - Ronald Knox

Motherhood: Feeding them as a baby and then through most of their twenties. - Unknown

You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. - George W. Bush

As a child, my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it. - Buddy Hackett

Seek the wisdom of the ages, but look at the world through the eyes of a child. - Ron Wild

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. - Pablo Picasso

The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth. - African Proverb

An ugly baby is a very nasty object, and the prettiest is frightful when undressed. - Queen Victoria

The firsts go away - first love, first baby, first kiss. You have to create new ones. - Sarah Jessica Parker

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

It's one of the great urban myths that people get pregnant in order to have children. - Menzies Campbell

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

Judging a child taking his first steps for not being able to run a marathon is shortsighted. - Tyler Winklevoss

Television has changed the American child from an irresistable force to an immovable object. - Laurence J Peter

When I go home, I play with my baby dolls and strollers and diaper bags, and play with my sisters. - Dakota Fanning

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

It is an act of love to say, "I believe in you as my child, and you don't need my help." - Peter Buffett

If the loss of shame was the child of secularization, the loss of reason is the child of pluralization. - Ravi Zacharias

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

Every child should have an occasional pat on the back as long as it is applied low enough and hard enough. - Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

I never used to like babies. I'd always thought if a baby were more like a chimpanzee, I'd have one. - Candice Bergen

The child should gain no request by anger; when he is quiet let him be offered what was refused when he wept. - Seneca

Let early education be a sort of amusement; you will then better be able to find out the natural bent of the child. - Plato

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

Do you think you're safe in a car with your seatbelt on? Dream on. My friend thought so. Now she's pregnant. - Anke Engelke

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

He adopted a role called being a father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a protector. - Tom Wolfe

A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason; to always be curious; and to fight tirelessly for something. - Paulo Coelho

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. - Elizabeth Stone

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The heart of who I am as a person and as a man is forgiveness, after forgiving my father for a lot of things that were done when I was a child. - Tyler Perry

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik