#1 humor site on the 'net

Cell Phone Book

For classes where cell phones aren't allowed

Cell Phone Book thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Books think for me. - Charles Lamb

No furniture so charming as books. - Sydney Smith

A multitude of books distracts the mind. - Seneca

When I was your age, television was called books. - William Goldman

It's a very good historical book about history. - Dan Quayle

I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose. - Steven Wright

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

The best books... are those that tell you what you know already. - George Orwell

If it’s the Psychic Network, why do they need a phone number? - Robin Williams

The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. - St. Augustine

It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations. - Winston Churchill

Books should be tried by a judge and jury as though they were crimes. - Samuel Butler

There are books of which the backs and covers are by far the best parts. - Charles Dickens

Next to acquiring good friends, the best acquisition is that of good books. - Charles Caleb Colton

Life is like looking for your phone. Most of the time it's in your hand. - Unknown

You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me. - C S Lewis

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

The worst thing about new books is that they keep us from reading the old ones. - John Wooden

There's no better book with which to defend the Bible than the Bible itself. - Dwight L. Moody

There is more treasure in books than all the pirate's loot on treasure island. - Walt Disney

The books that the world calls immoral are books that show the world its own shame. - Oscar Wilde

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex. She called me from Chicago last night. - Rodney Dangerfield

Like the Good Book says, "Let him who is without sin be the rolling stone." - Archie Bunker

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them. - Mark Twain

It's not the cost of the book. It's what it may cost you not to buy and read it. - Jim Rohn

If you're going to write a book on how to raise children, do it before you have them. - Bob McLaren

The most important part of a story is the ending. No one reads a book to get to the middle. - Mickey Spillane

This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two. - George Burns

I am a writer of books in retrospect. I talk in order to understand; I teach in order to learn. - Robert Frost

There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written, or badly written. - Oscar Wilde

I am not afraid that the book will be controversial, I'm afraid it will not be controversial. - Flannery O'Connor

There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it. - Bertrand Russell

Let the young know they will never find a more interesting, more instructive book than the patient himself. - Giorgio Baglivi

So I'm reading a book on my new iPad, but can't the iPad read it for me? Do I have to do everything? - Matthew Perry

I have written a book. This will come as quite a shock to some. They didn't think I could read, much less write. - George W. Bush

Keeping books on social aid is capitalistic nonsense. I just use the money for the poor. I can't stop to count it. - Evita Peron

When you read a classic you do not see in the book more than you did before. You see more in you than there was before. - Clifton Fadiman

Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers. - Charles W. Eliot

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker


The Bicycle Tree of Vashon Island

Commemorative Pistol

Rad Cat - Curled Up Cat Nap

A Dog's Worst Nightmare

Bike Park - Where'd It Go?

Yoga Man

Dog Walking For a Healthy Lifestyle

Outhouse Bike

Ice Cone Cat

Disciple Golf Day

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Invisible Patient

Buy One Get One Free

Little Drinker

We Get It, You're From Texas

Bed Ridden and Proud Of It

Redneck Cooler

Saskatchewan Mansion

Make America Grate Again

Flower Basket

Donkey Cart

Music Note Chairlift

Thanks For Noticing

Winter Cyclist