#1 humor site on the 'net

Best Chest Forward

Measuring up for the Indian Army

Best Chest Forward thanks to Barry McCartney

Where size does matter!

QuotaBills
Drill Sergeant: An army dentist. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Love is a kind of military service. - Ovid

I now close my military career and just fade away. - Douglas MacArthur

Net Worth: Measurement of a fisherman's wealth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Trust should be the basis for all our moral training. - Robert Baden-Powell

The fastest way to a man's heart is through his chest. - Roseanne Barr

Self-acceptance leads to success, not the other way around. - Deepak Chopra

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music. - Groucho Marx

Creative minds have been known to survive any sort of bad training. - Anna Freud

All the statistics in the world can't measure the warmth of a smile. - Chris Hart

I don't think about financial success as the measurement of my success. - Christie Hefner

An army of sheep led by a lion would defeat an army of lions led by a sheep. - African Proverb

Anything less than a commitment to excellence is an acceptance of mediocrity. - Vince Lombardi

Acceptance, tolerance, bravery, compassion. These are the things my mom taught me. - Lady Gaga

Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good. - Samuel Johnson

Somewhere in the world someone is training when you are not. When you race him, he will win. - Tom Fleming

Samson, he takes the jawbone out of the grass and he kills the whole army of the Phillipines. - Archie Bunker

It used to be that when all else failed, a guy went into the army; now he becomes a consultant. - Blackie Sherrod

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. - W.T. Purkiser

Stop the words now. Open the window in the center of your chest and let the spirits fly in and out. - Rumi

The only thing worse than training employees and losing them, is not training them and keeping them. - Zig Ziglar

The measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he would never be found out. - Thomas B Macaulay

You can measure opportunity with the same yardstick that measures the risk involved. They go together. - Earl Nightingale

Never measure the height of a mountain, until you have reached the top. Then you will see how low it was. - Dag Hammarskjold

The man who can make others laugh secures more votes for a measure than the man who forces them to think. - Malcolm de Chazal

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

I don't measure a man's success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom. - George S Patton

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor. - Abe Lemons

A boss on vacation is the most cost effective measure. Everybody in the office has a vacation at the cost of one. - Thibaut

Don't measure yourself by what you have accomplished, but by what you should have accomplished with your ability. - John Wooden

Rock is so much fun. That's what it's all about - filling up the chest cavities and empty kneecaps and elbows. - Jimi Hendrix

Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight. - Josh Billings

The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur C. Clarke

We do not need to attend classroom training programs for everything. Observation opens the windows of knowledge around us. - Sukant Ratnakar

I hated every minute of training, but I said, "Don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion." - Muhammad Ali

A doable goal for me is to finish a marathon under four hours. I'm doing all the training, but the hardest part is eating right. - Sean Astin

There's only one thing worse than training your staff and having them leave, and that's not training them and having them stay. - Zig Ziglar

There are three subjects on which the knowledge of the medical profession in general is woefully weak; they are manners, morals, and medicine. - Gerald F Lieberman


Tourist Baggage

Amish Sailboat

Aging Cyclist

Best Tea Cup

Shoddy Goaltending - Not

Roller Derby Princess

Redneck Hotter Tub

Walk The Line

Sidewalk Jammies

Senior Center Reminder

Time Of Day

Waiting Is Good

Solar Charging

Submergible

Fast Closure

Penalty Shot

Redneck Date

Non-Hot Dog

Unattended Children

Open Goal Forgiveness

Double Your Vision

How To Become A Pirate

He Did It

HorseBack Riding