Baby Shower

Hasta la vista, baby. - Terminator 2: Judgement Day

Up there in his ivory shower - Archie Bunker

A child is a curly dimpled lunatic. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Deceitful: Infant who needs changing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ballroom: A nursery for crying babies - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It takes a whole village to raise a child. - African Proverb

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

A child educated only at school is an uneducated child. - George Santayana

You take more pictures of your baby than NASA does of Mars. - Unknown

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

If you can give your child only one gift, let it be enthusiasm. - Bruce Barton

Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed. - Maria Montessori

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one. - Leo J Burke

If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower. - Groucho Marx

A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love. - Stendhal

Experience is the child of thought, and thought is the child of action. - Benjamin Disraeli

Ma-ma does everything for the baby, who responds by saying Da-da first. - Mignon McLaughlin

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test. - George W. Bush

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born? - Benny Hill

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up. - Pablo Picasso

If newborn babies could speak they would be the most intelligent beings on planet earth. - Jaden Smith

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

Judging a child taking his first steps for not being able to run a marathon is shortsighted. - Tyler Winklevoss

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

I brought children into this dark world because it needed the light that only a child can bring. - Liz Armbruster

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age. - Benjamin Spock

The baby bat
Screamed out in fright,
'Turn on the dark,
I'm afraid of the light.' - Shel Silverstein

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, 'Am I having fun?' - Christopher Meloni

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

Babies are bits of stardust, blown from the hand of God. Lucky the woman who knows the pangs of birth, for she has held a star. - Larry Barratto

No one ever wants to see his or her name linked to anything bad. Conscience is like a baby. It has to go to sleep before you can. - Harvey Mackay

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The heart of who I am as a person and as a man is forgiveness, after forgiving my father for a lot of things that were done when I was a child. - Tyler Perry

Our babies are like penguins; penguin babies can't exist unless more than one person is taking care of them. They just can't keep going. - Alison Gopnik

Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again. - Dag Hammarskjold