Baby Shower

No one vinces me, baby - Michael Grant

Up there in his ivory shower - Archie Bunker

Babies are such a nice way to start people. - Don Herold

A baby's laugh is an angel's voice. - Unknown

It is a wise father that knows his own child. - William Shakespeare

Howling Success: The baby that gets picked up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Implement: Mischievous child's garden tool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Ever notice how baby shampoo smells like spring? - Toni Sorenson

Bison: What you say when your child leaves for school - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A child seldom needs a good talking to as a good listening to. - Robert Brault

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

Never help a child with a task at which he feels he can succeed. - Maria Montessori

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. - Fran Lebowitz

There is no cure for birth and death, save to enjoy the interval. - George Santayana

As a child, the only clear thought I had was "Get candy." - Jerry Seinfeld

The last thing my kids ever did to earn money was lose their baby teeth. - Phyllis Diller

Clients don't care about the labor pains; they want to see the baby. - Tim Williams

A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Unknown

Who is more foolish, the child afraid of the dark or the man afraid of the light? - Maurice Freehill

Kidnap: 1. Something that a young child takes when tired; 2. When a baby goat sleeps. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. There are seven million. - Walt Streightiff

Chutzpapa: A father who wakes his wife at 4 a.m. so she can change the baby's diaper - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's easier to build up a child than it is to repair an adult. Choose your words wisely. - Unknown

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. - Bill Cosby

I'm beginning to have morning sickness. I'm not having a baby, I'm just sick of morning. - Phyllis Diller

It is an act of love to say, "I believe in you as my child, and you don't need my help." - Peter Buffett

If the loss of shame was the child of secularization, the loss of reason is the child of pluralization. - Ravi Zacharias

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

Since people are going to be living longer and getting older, they'll just have to learn how to be babies longer. - Andy Warhol

Unbreakable Toy: 1. An object that is indestructible - until a child plays with it; 2. Useful for breaking other toys. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, 'Am I having fun?' - Christopher Meloni

The circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant. It is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are. - Mewtwo

Remember the days when you let your child have some chocolate if he finished his cereal? Now, chocolate is one of the cereals. - Robert Orben

I was not a child prodigy, because a child prodigy is a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows up. - Will Rogers

The heart of who I am as a person and as a man is forgiveness, after forgiving my father for a lot of things that were done when I was a child. - Tyler Perry

Forgiveness is the answer to the child's dream of a miracle by which what is broken is made whole again, what is soiled is made clean again. - Dag Hammarskjold

A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm. - Bill Vaughan