Apology to Potential Criminals

Leave the gun, take the cannoli. - The Godfather

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

Nobody ever died of being shot by a cookie. - Ilona Andrews

Those who trade liberty for security have neither. - John Adams

Guns have only two enemies - rust and politicians. - Unknown

Shooting Star: A famous actor who uses his gun too often - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

I was an equal opportunity eater. Every ethnic group got a shot. - Bill Clinton

I made a killing on Wall Street a few years ago. I shot my broker. - Groucho Marx

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot. - Charlie Chaplin

There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at without result. - Winston Churchill

A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. - Mario Puzo

Window: 1. A looking-out glass; 2. Place in the truck to hang your guns. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only point in making money is, you can tell some big shot where to go. - Humphrey Bogart

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

All I can say is, if they show my butt in a movie, it better be a wide shot. - Jennifer Lopez

Valentine's Day is the day when you remember that Cupid was a lousy shot. - Milton Berle

There's something fundamentally wrong with bringing a knife to a gun fight. - Sean Connery

Security is mostly a superstition. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. - Helen Keller

Let everyone leave all the guns - British guns and Irish guns - outside the door. - Martin McGuinness

It is true greatness to have in one the frailty of a man and the security of a god. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

I'm a Catholic deer hunter. I am happy to be clinging to my guns and my religion. - Paul Ryan

When I take a gun in hand, the safest place for a pheasant is just opposite the muzzle. - Sydney Smith

It is the greatest shot of adrenaline to be doing what you've wanted to do so badly. - Charles Lindbergh

I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas.
How he got into my pyjamas I'll never know. - Groucho Marx

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

The policemen or soldiers are only a gun in the establishments hand. They make the racist secure in his racism. - Huey Newton

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

If you can't even acknowledge that you have to fix social security, that's not a very good starting point. - Rob Portman

The Supreme Court's only armor is the cloak of public trust; its sole ammunition, the collective hopes of our society. - Irving R. Kaufman

When it comes to politics, I sit down on a sofa and grab some popcorn - or sometimes I crouch down in order not to get shot. - Sergey Galitsky

My best security is within the munitions of an immutable Jehovah, where His unalterable promises stand like giant walls of rock. - Charles H Spurgeon

Is fuel efficiency really what we need most desperately? I say what we really need is a car that can be shot when it breaks down. - George Carlin

I come bearing an olive branch in one hand, and the freedom fighter's gun in the other. Do not let the olive branch fall from my hand. - Yasser Arafat

Social Security's not the hard one to solve. Medicare, that is the gorilla in the room, and you've got to put all of it on the table. - Joe Biden

While awaiting sentencing, I decided to give stand-up comedy a shot. The judge had suggested I get my act together, and I took him seriously. - Tim Allen

I not only knew Houdini, but we had a very lovely relationship. I really though we had something going, and then the son of a gun disappeared. - Betty White