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Fishing Show: Reel-life TV. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Telegant: Looking good on TV - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

TV: Chewing gum for the eyes. - Frank Lloyd Wright

Weather forecast for tonight: dark. - George Carlin

Television is democracy at its ugliest. - Paddy Chayefsky

A TV licence is a licence to print money. - Roy Thomson

It's the hottest thing on television. - Donald Trump

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

Television has raised writing to a new low. - Samuel Goldwyn

When I was your age, television was called books. - William Goldman

Television proves that sight has a definite odor. - Gerald F Lieberman

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

Weekend forecast: crafting with a chance of chocolate. - Unknown

Bed is like the womb, only drier and with better TV reception. - Linda Richman

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

Canadian cities looked the way American cities did on television. - William Gibson

When your wife asks what's on TV, dust is not the right answer. - Unknown

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television. - Archie Bunker

Television has brought back murder into the home... where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

I think Les Moonves is the most highly overrated person in television. - Donald Trump

She walked across the ballroom as if she were trudging through deep snow. - Noel Coward

Getting an award from TV is like being kissed by someone with bad breath. - Mason Williams

There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets? - Dick Cavett

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

For those of you watching who do not have television sets, live commentary is on Radio 2. - David Coleman

I wanted this to be a movie on TV so I could press the off button and make it all go away. - Michelle Rowen

One of the most important gifts we have in television - the ability to heal through laughter. - Soleil M Frye

I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge

I chose the Egyptian dream: the dream to make a TV show, and then be called an infidel by the end. - Bassem Youssef

Just 'cause there's snow in the basement don't mean there ain't no fire in the roof! - Archie Bunker

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight. - Milton Berle

One of television's great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV! - Homer Simpson

The Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love. - Margaret Atwood

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

Indians are the second largest population in the world, but we're invisible on TV - everything is either black or white. - Russell Peters

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

We pick politicians by how they look on TV and Miss America on where she stands on the issues. Isn't that a little backwards? - Jay Leno

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright


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