#1 humor site on the 'net

Turtle Lunch Lineup

When you might not want to be first in line

Turtle Lunch Lineup thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
See you later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. - Bill Haley

Try to be like the turtle - at ease in your own shell. - Bill Copeland

Take a walk with a turtle. And behold the world in pause. - Bruce Feiler

I'm in the turtle's race. My journey is a marathon. - Omari Hardwick

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? - George Carlin

You are absolutely free to describe me as a turtle or something. - Paul Giamatti

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

I'm Southern, so alligator tail is pretty interesting and yummy. - LeAnn Rimes

Behold the turtle. He only makes progress when he sticks his neck out. - James Bryant Conant

Don't taunt the alligator until after you've crossed the creek. - Dan Rather

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile - hoping that it will eat him last. - Winston Churchill

Anytime you see a turtle up on top of a fence post, you know he had some help. - Alex Haley

I spent most of my 20s with these alligator wrestlers in the swamps of South Florida. - Karen Russell

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

You know you're old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot. - Phyllis Diller

Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill you and eat you. People are harder. Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first. - Steve Irwin


World Cup Elephant

Alternative To Spanking

That Takes Some Skill

The Ass Family

Kids Meal

Stretch Exercises You Can Do At Your Desk

A Foot Of Sun

Sushi Spine

Police Targeting

Happy Bird's Eye UU

Moose Parking

Glassman

Paint Pants

World Cup Attention Getter

Fear Of Light

Bird Condo

Very Cold Beer

Seniors Bike Club

Watching The World Cup

Friendly BBQ Reminder

Geek Piano

Ugly Haircut

XL Safety Shoes

Dance With Me