#1 humor site on the 'net

Tight Tractor

Buying a van just big enough for your tractor

Tight Tractor thanks to Keith Blake

Bubba's prototype design for Mad Max movie

No wasted space for Bubba

QuotaBills
Organic Farm: Tilling like it is - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Trust in God - but tie your camel tight. - Persian Proverb

I take my vacation on the combine and tractor. - Jon Tester

Maybe I should just go home and ride my tractor. - Chuck Grassley

A good farm is recognized as good partly by its beauty. - Wendell Berry

Farm: What a city man dreams of at 5 P.M., never at 5 A.M. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I drove a tractor almost as soon as I could reach the pedals. - Sheri L. Dew

A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor. - Unknown

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown

The ideal attitude is to be physically loose and mentally tight. - Arthur Ashe

I knew if I ever got in a tight spot, that you would come, if alive. - William Tecumseh Sherman

Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo

Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. - Eminem

Guarantee: A legal vehicle which expires on the same day as your mechanical one - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I used to practice my speeches on my tractor while I plowed my daddy's field. - Jim Hunt

Abundance: 1. Big party held in a bakery; 2. A social event held in a farm building. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

Let's just say, I'm Irish. I grew up in the 1950s. Religion had a very tight iron fist. - Liam Neeson

Life on a farm is a school of patience. You can't hurry the crops or make an ox in two days. - Haneri Liogier

Muffin Top: The unsightly roll of flesh that spills over the waist of a pair of too-tight pants. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

One day someone is going to hug you so tight that all of your broken pieces will stick back together. - Unknown

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

There is only what you want and what happens. There is only grabbing on and holding tight in the darkness. - Lauren Oliver

I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis

I'm working on a second cookbook and am working on my love story, 'Black Heels to Tractor Wheels.' - Ree Drummond

I spend hours mowing the lawn in absolutely straight lines on my tractor. If it's not right, I do it again. - Britt Ekland

It is questionable if all the mechanical inventions yet made have lightened the day's toil of any human being. - John S Mill

The minute there's a map, there is no art. Paint by numbers is not art. Paint by numbers is a mechanical activity. - Seth Godin

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket, or a holding pattern over Philadelphia. - Judith Viorst

When we encounter an unexpected challenge or threat, the only way to save ourselves is to hold on tight to the people around us and not let go. - Shawn Achor

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin

I enjoy my John Deere tractor quite a lot. It's a tool that I must use to keep Mother Nature at bay. I have all kinds of things encroaching on my property. - Les Claypool

In a climate of tight budgets, reduced workforces and stiff competition, internal training can be a great substitute for costly offsite workshops and conferences. - Harvey Mackay

When we went into World War II, I was a tractor driver then. I drove tractors on the plantation. So when they start calling people my age, 18, up, I was one they called. - B.B. King

Humor has bailed me out of more tight situations than I can think of. If you go with your instincts and keep your humor, creativity follows. With luck, success comes, too. - Jimmy Buffett

If I hadn't become a golfer, I doubt I'd be wealthy, because I don't have the sort of ego that drives a person all day long. I might have wound up driving a tractor. - Fuzzy Zoeller

Mathematical rigor is like clothing: in its style it ought to suit the occasion, and it diminishes comfort and restrains freedom of movement if it is neither too loose or too tight. - G.F. Simmons

Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. - Dwight D Eisenhower

A mechanical puzzle is a self contained object, composed of one or more parts, which involves a problem for one person to solve by manipulation using logic, reasoning, insight, luck, and/or dexterity. - Jerry Slocum


'Cover Girl' Magazine

One At A Time

Shofar So Good

Temple Car

Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet

Edible Clock

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks

Bear Pinata

Swim Vacation

What Are Your Skills?