QuotaBillsAfford: Popular type of car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker
Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig
Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck
You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck
We all thought we'd have flying cars by now, but we don't. - Dana Brunetti
To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner
I know the guy who writes all those bumper stickers. He hates New York. - Steven Wright
A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow
A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont
I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck
I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best
You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha
Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown
A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen
I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright
The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker
Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck
Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson
I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright
When Henry Ford made cheap, reliable cars people said, 'Nah, what's wrong with a horse?' - Elon Musk
If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler
I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson
I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby
Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The minute there's a map, there is no art. Paint by numbers is not art. Paint by numbers is a mechanical activity. - Seth Godin
The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly
If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 2,000 MPG. - Bill Gates
I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare
Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor
My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck
I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown
It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor
Tonight we'll be talking to a car designer who's crossed Toyota with Quasimodo and come up with the Hatchback of Notre Dame. - Ronnie Corbett
A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman
My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz