Redneck Skurfing

I surf to get tan. - Shane Dorian

Out of water, I am nothing. - Duke Kahanamoku

The water doesn't know how old you are. - Dara Torres

I've tried body surfing. It's nice. - Ziggy Marley

I've committed to surfing the rest of my life. - Lance Armstrong

People run from rain but sit in bathtubs full of water. - Charles Bukowski

You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf. - John Kabat-Zinn

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

Say anything that you like about me except that I drink water. - WC Fields

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. - English Proverb

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

If his IQ slips any lower, we'll have to water him twice a day. - Molly Ivins

There is nothing, nothing, more sad than a surfer who used to surf. - Unknown

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

An entire ocean can't sink a ship unless it allows the water inside. - Donna Smith

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

When ya go out there in the water and ya start crossing your longirudes and lassitudes. - Archie Bunker

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

Surfing is very much like making love. It always feels good, no matter how many times you've done it. - Paul Strauch

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

How come if you mix flour and water together you get glue? And when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go? - Rita Rudner

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

The joy of surfing is so many things combined, from the physical exertion of it, to the challenge of it, to the mental side of the sport. - Kelly Slater

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci

A leader is not an administrator who loves to run others, but someone who carries water for his people, so that they can get on with their jobs. - Robert Townsend

If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: "President Can't Swim." - Lyndon B. Johnson

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler

Your surfing can get better on every turn, on every wave you catch. Learn to read the ocean better. A big part of my success has been wave knowledge. - Kelly Slater