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Redneck Riding Lawnmower

Cheap riding lawnmowers in Alabama

Redneck Riding Lawnmower thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Bubba and Jethro on the lookout for wild gophers

QuotaBills
Meat: Grass once removed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Tantamount: Riding a French Aunt - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Paddy O Furniture: Irish lawn chairs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party. - Proverb

A lawn is nature under totalitarian rule. - Michael Pollan

When you're riding lead, don't spit. - Unknown

Have patience! In time, even grass becomes milk. - Charan Singh

Laundress: A gown worn while sitting on the grass - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life. - Charles M. Schulz

Absent-Mindedness: Searching for the horse you are riding - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When two elephants fight it is the grass that gets trampled. - African Proverb

A leaf of grass is no less than the journey-work of the stars. - Walt Whitman

A people without history is like the wind on the buffalo grass. - Lakota Sioux Proverb

As a prize - a beautiful riding mower with optional ass scratcher! - Unknown

Riding: The art of keeping a horse between yourself and the ground - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I will clean house when Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. - Roseanne Barr

All you need to grow fine, vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk. - Will Rogers

I always thought a yard was three feet, then I started mowing the lawn. - C.E. Cowman

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

If dandelions were hard to grow, they would be most welcome on any lawn. - Andrew V. Mason

I was always a character actor: I just looked like Little Red Riding Hood. - Paul Newman

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving. - Albert Einstein

Business is like riding a bicycle. Either you keep moving or you fall down. - John D. Wright

Sitting quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and the grass grows by itself. - Zenrin

Books are no different from goats - they enjoy an afternoon out on the lawn. - Kate Bernheimer

The grass may be greener on the other side, but it's just as hard to cut. - Little Richard

If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life. - Cher

Ever hear of the old saying, "grass don't grow on a busy street?" - Archie Bunker

The grass withers, the flower fades
But the word of our God stands forever. - Isaiah 40:8

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance. - Tim Allen

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

Life is like riding a bicycle. You don't fall off unless you plan to stop pedaling. - Claude Pepper

Every blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, 'Grow, grow.' - Talmud

Shady Character: A fellow who snoozes in a hammock under a tree while his wife mows the lawn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

Samson, he takes the jawbone out of the grass and he kills the whole army of the Phillipines. - Archie Bunker

There's one good thing about snow: it makes your lawn look as nice as your neighbor's. - Clyde Moore

Once you're a mom, you're always a mom. It's like riding a bike, you never forget. - Taraji P Henson

A good wife is one who can mow the lawn in the summer and put up the storm windows in the winter. - WC Fields

Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence. - Hal Borland

I took lessons in bicycle riding. But I could only afford half of them. Now I can ride a unicycle. - Steven Wright

When witches go riding and black cats are seen,
The moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween. - Unknown

I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller

An Irishman is never drunk as long as he can hold onto one blade of grass to keep from falling off the earth. - Unknown

If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there. - Will Rogers

I spend hours mowing the lawn in absolutely straight lines on my tractor. If it's not right, I do it again. - Britt Ekland

The bulletin board on the lawn of a New Jersey Church reads "We reserve the right to accept everybody." - John Kazmark

Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. - Bob Marley

Gardener: 1. Someone who thinks that what goes down must come up; 2. A man who never lets grass grow under his feet. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken. - James Dent

Grass: 1. The green stuff that wilts in the yard and flourishes in the garden; 2. What grows by the yard and dies by the foot. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

Personal columnists are jackals and no jackal has been known to live on grass once he had learned about meat - no matter who killed the meat for him. - Ernest Hemingway


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