#1 humor site on the 'net

One Size Fits All

Mini car with max head room

One Size Fits All thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
If the glove doesn't fit, you must acquit. - Johnnie Cochran

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts. - Albert Einstein

A man who won't die for something is not fit to live. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

A fit, healthy body - that is the best fashion statement. - Jess C. Scott

Life is like Tetris: if it doesn't fit, just flip it over. - Sabine Hein

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

Wealthy people miss one of life's greatest thrills: making the last car payment. - Unknown

It's not the size of the man in the fight, but the size of the fight in the man. - Unknown

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

If you haven't found something you are willing to die for, you aren't fit to live. - Martin Luther King Jr.

The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases. - Carl Jung

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

If I weren't skateboarding, I'd love to race cars. I like anything that's fast and active. - Ryan Sheckler

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everybody will respect you. - Lao-Tzu

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

A dwarf who brings a standard along with him to measure his own size is a dwarf in more articles than one. - Laurence Stern

I keep fit. Every morning, I do a hundred laps of an Olympic-sized swimming pool - in a small motor launch. - Peter Cook

Melody is the essence of music. I compare a good melodist to a fine racer, and counterpoints to hack post-horses. - Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. - Jerry Seinfeld

I've no interest on initiating a fashion trend on Coruscant or anywhere else. I simply want a uniform that fits. - James Luceno

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

There is neither happiness nor misery in the world; there is only the comparison of one state with another, nothing more. - Alexandre Dumas

Confidence is beautiful, no matter your size, no matter your weight. Be confident in who you are and you'll be beautiful. - Unknown

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

If I'm ever stuck on a respirator or a life support system, I definitely want to be unplugged, but not until I'm down to a size eight. - Henriette Mantel

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright


Corona Isolation

Cat Cookie

Worn Brakes

Apprentice Auto Body Shop

Moving Level Pro

Redneck Muffler Repair

Eggsellent Bike

Prairie Bear

Clinton Greeting

Halloween Flashers

Saying Pun

Redneck Blinds

Kid Disposal

Motorvation

Electric Football

Montgomery Ward 1934 Christmas Catalog

Halloween Lamp

Making Music Together

Back Asswards

Tent Peg Setup

Fang Treats

Model T Snowmobile

Skinny Puddy Tat

Redneck Cocktail