One Size Fits All

We have not fit men for the times. - John Adams

Why fit in when you were born to stand out? - Dr. Seuss

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. - George Carlin

Not all the news that's fit to print is fit to read. - Unknown

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

I'm into fitness: Fit'ness whole donut in my mouth. - Unknown

The size of a man is measured by what it takes to upset him. - Unknown

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

When advice is freely given, the receiver is free to use it as he or she sees fit. - Harvey Mackay

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days. - Tim Allen

I have nothing but troubles with my car. Every Sunday I take my family out for a push. - Rodney Dangerfield

One cannot and must not try to erase the past merely because it does not fit the present. - Golda Meir

I thought I knew Texas pretty well, but I had no notion of its size until I campaigned it. - Ann Richards

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Snaccident: Eating an entire pizza, box of chocolates, or family size bag of chips by mistake - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

HonkoSecond: The time between the light turning green and the sound from the car horn behind you - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Golden Age: When the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

You describe the elephant by its size, but the mosquito by its impact. Even the smallest thing has an impact. - Celia Apeagyei-Collins

I'm eighteen years behind in my ironing. There's no use doing it now, it doesn't fit anybody I know. - Phyllis Diller

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. - Jerry Seinfeld

Families are like puzzles. They fit together in a certain way, and if one piece is missing, it throws everything off. - Richard Schiff

The actual building of roads devoted to motor cars is not for the near future, in spite of many rumors to that effect. - Harper's Weekly

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

If you want to make a permanent change, stop focusing on the size of your problems and start focusing on the size of you. - T. Harv Eker

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

To look backward for a while is to refresh the eye, to restore it, and to render it more fit for its prime function of looking forward. - Margaret Barber

I'm off the diet, but not the treadmill. I speak as someone who's attempted to lose weight and get fit thrice before in my life. - Ronnie Screwvala

When you compare the sorrows of real life to the pleasures of the imaginary one, you will never want to live again, only to dream forever. - Alexandre Dumas

The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire, the size of your dream, and how you handle disappointment along the way. - Robert Kiyosaki

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright

Car Pool: Complicated system of transportation where Mom always winds up going the furthest with the biggest bunch of kids who have had the most sugar - Daffynitions joe-ks.com