#1 humor site on the 'net

McDonald's New Customer

Serving even obstinate customers

McDonald's New Customer thanks to Keith Blake

Bubba likes going to McDonald's even though his ass doesn't

QuotaBills
Silence is safer than speech. - Epictetus

Humor is a universal language. - Joel Goodman

Fair speech may hide a foul heart. - JRR Tolkien

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

A proverb is to speech what salt is to food. - Arabic Proverb

Music is well said to be the speech of angels. - Thomas Carlyle

English Wrestling Champion: A lord of the ring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A story is told as much by silence as by speech. - Susan Griffin

Synonym Bun: What a thesaurus eats for breakfast - Unknown

Speech was given to man to disguise his thoughts. - Charles de Talleyrand

The English never draw a line without blurring it. - Winston Churchill

I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. - Xenocrates

Ratify: To use a spell and turn a person into a rodent - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech. - Clifton Fadiman

A fool is known by his speech; and a wise man by silence. - Pythagoras

The English winter - ending in July, to recommence in August. - Lord Byron

You don't have good grammar when you type with your fists. - C.F. Payne

I respect a man who knows how to spell a word more than one way. - Mark Twain

If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed

We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English. - Winston Churchill

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

Wisdom is knowing when to speak your mind and when to mind your speech. - Evangel

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe

Language: The blood of the soul into which thoughts run, and out of which they grow - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am going to give a long speech today. I haven't had time to prepare a short one. - Winston Churchill

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Never lose an opportunity of seeing anything beautiful, for beauty is God's handwriting. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech. - George Bernard Shaw

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

To suppress free speech is a double wrong. It violates the rights of the hearer as well as those of the speaker. - Frederick Douglass

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized. - Oscar Wilde

If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

I'm not an equipment nut. I tend to use whatever's at hand. I have several cameras, of course, but I'm not emotional about any of them. - Leonard Nimoy


Fishnet Stockings

Saskatchewan Freeway

They All Look So Jacozy

Sunset Eclipse

Ikea Blueprint

Flight of the Ladybug

Nerve Twitch

Yellowstone Bears

Kayak Funeral

Dutch Bike

Breadlace

Sled Dog

Hog Hunter

Magic Puppies

Log Sticks

Tree Face

Camper Tank

Shipley Donut Pants

Distressing Artwork

Child's Motorcycle Helmet

Montana Mountain Bike

Sealtastic

Bland Entrance

Cruising Advice