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Marital Rating Chart - Husband

1939 marriage expectations - Calculate your husband's raw score

Marital Rating Chart - Husband thanks to Cherei McCarter

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Marry money. - Max Shulman

Knewlyweds: Second marriage for both - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Marriage is not a word but a sentence. - Unknown

One does not marry art. One ravishes it. - Edgar Degas

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

Before we make love my husband takes a pain killer. - Joan Rivers

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

I want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad. - Oedipus Rex

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside. - Roseanne Barr

Marriage: A word which should be pronounced "mirage." - Herbert Spencer

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. - Red Skelton

The general rule is that people who enjoy life also enjoy marriage. - Phyllis Battelle

Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad. - Woody Allen

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. - Unknown

I don't follow trends. I make each cake for a particular wedding, or event. - Ron Ben-Israel

Sir, it is your duty to get married. You can't be always living for pleasure. - Oscar Wilde

My husband's German. Every night I get dressed up as Poland and he invades me. - Bette Midler

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. - Rita Rudner

If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rim shots during the vows. - Sam Kinison

Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed. - Oscar Wilde

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

My husband and I had our best sex during our divorce. It was like cheating on our lawyers. - Priscilla Lopez

If Hillary Clinton can't satisfy her husband what makes her think she can satisfy America. - Donald Trump

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Many marriages would be better if the husband and wife clearly understood that they are on the same side. - Zig Ziglar

Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. - Mickey Rooney

The Irish Catholic side was married to the life of an actor and I found out acting could be a form of prayer. - Liam Neeson

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Just because I have rice on my clothes doesn't mean I've been to a wedding. A Chinese man threw up on me. - Phyllis Diller

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it; 2. Whenever you're right, shut up. - Patrick Murra

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

Don't over-analyze your marriage; it's like yanking up a fragile indoor plant every 20 minutes to see how its roots are growing. - Ogden Nash

One advantage of marriage is that when you fall out of love with him or he falls out of love with you, it keeps you together until you fall in again. - Judith Viorst


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