Made His Bed

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

A revolution is not a bed of roses. - Fidel Castro

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

As you make your bed, so you must lie in it. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

To my embarrassment, I was born in bed with a lady. - Wilson Mizner

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

He who sleeps on the floor will not fall off the bed. - Robert Gronock

Anybody who hates dogs and babies can't be all bad. - Leo Rosten

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

For Fang, getting out of bed in the morning is a career move. - Phyllis Diller

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Bad habits are like a good bed; easy to get into but difficult to get out of. - Unknown

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

Let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help get them back in bed again. - Will Rogers

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

It's true Fang and I fight, but we've never gone to bed mad. Of course, one year we were up for three months. - Phyllis Diller

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

Among God's creatures two, the dog and the guitar, have taken all the sizes and all the shapes, in order not to be separated from the man. - Andres Segovia

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash