Made His Bed

Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let sleeping dogs lie. - French Proverb

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

A hungry dog will eat dirty puddings. - Latin Proverb

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. - George Burns

Early to bed, early to rise, work like hell and advertise. - Ted Turner

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of. - Unknown

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

Let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help get them back in bed again. - Will Rogers

Don't make the mistake of treating your dogs like humans, or they'll treat you like dogs. - Martha Scott

No human being believes that any other human being has a right to be in bed when he himself is up. - Robert Lynd

What a pity Hell's gates are not kept by O'Flynn
The surly old dog would let nobody in. - Patrick Ireland

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

Sunsets are great. Sunrises are a mixed bag. You either got up way too early or went to bed way too late. - Matt Dillon

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. - Erma Bombeck

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

I thank the Lord I no longer have to go to work. I just get out of bed in the morning, and there it is - all around me. - Unknown

It was character that got us out of bed, commitment that moved us into action, and discipline that enabled us to follow through. - Zig Ziglar

What's money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do. - Bob Dylan

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright