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Well-behaved women seldom make history. - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich

When the devil finds a lazy woman, he puts her to work. - Russian Proverb

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. - H L Mencken

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

Anesthetic: The painkiller that crazy women refuse during labour - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As long as she thinks of a man, nobody objects to a woman thinking. - Virginia Woolf

There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither one works. - Will Rogers

I love men, not because they are men, but because they are not women. - Queen Christina of Sweden

Most women are afraid of clowns, but somehow end up still dating one. - Unknown

My greatest regret is not knowing at 30 what I knew about women at 60. - Arthur Miller

Some say women are addicted to chocolate. I say we're merely loyal. - Cathy Guisewite

The best years of a woman's life - the ten years between 39 and 40. - Unknown

No one but a woman in love ever sees the maximum of men's greatness. - Anais Nin

I wouldn't be caught dead marrying a woman old enough to be my wife. - Tony Curtis

Between man and woman there is little difference, but vive la difference. - French Proverb

Woman begins by resisting a man's advances and ends by blocking his retreat. - Oscar Wilde

Bimbo: Any woman to whom you pay a compliment, while in the company of your wife - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform. - Diane Mariechild

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water. - Eleanor Roosevelt

The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. - Helen Rowland

Let praise be given equally to women as well as men who have been distinguished in virtue. - Plato

A man has to be Joe McCarthy to be called ruthless. All a woman has to do is put you on hold. - Marlo Thomas

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious. - Oscar Wilde

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. - Unknown

No man succeeds without a good woman behind him. Wife or mother, if it is both, he is twice blessed indeed. - Godfrey Winn

No matter how plain a woman may be, if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will be beautiful. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of despair in a woman. - Oscar Wilde

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. - Albert Einstein

All of the women on 'The Apprentice' flirted with me - consciously or unconsciously. That's to be expected. - Donald Trump

How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being. - Oscar Wilde

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman - it depends on how much happiness you can handle. - George Burns

When a woman puts on a heel, she has a different posture, a different attitude. She really stands up and has a consciousness of her body. - Christian Louboutin

I believe there's an Almighty, and I believe the Almighty's great gift to each man and woman in this world is the desire to be free. - George W Bush

Blessed be Providence which has given to each his toy: the doll to the child, the child to the woman, the woman to the man, the man to the devil. - Victor Hugo

A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills. They'd make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while. - Robin Williams

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement. - Mark Twain

The animals of the world exist for their own reasons. They were not made for humans any more than black people were made for white, or women created for men. - Alice Walker

You sometimes see a woman who would have made a Joan of Arc in another century and climate, threshing herself to pieces over all the mean worry of housekeeping. - Rudyard Kipling

Aristotle could have avoided the mistake of thinking that women have fewer teeth than men, by the simple device of asking Mrs. Aristotle to keep her mouth open while he counted. - Bertrand Russell