QuotaBillsNo man is an Ireland. - Richard Daley
Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson
What Britain needs is an iron lady. - Margaret Thatcher
I speak two languages, English and Body. - Mae West
Ireland is the old sow that eats her farrow. - James Joyce
He was not only a bore; he bored for England. - Malcolm Muggeridge
English Wrestling Champion: A lord of the ring - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Women in London must have learned not to breathe. - Irene Trimble
The English never draw a line without blurring it. - Winston Churchill
England can never be ruined except by a Parliament. - Lord Burleigh
The English contribution to world cuisine. The chip. - John Cleese
Britain's goal is not to survive, but to prevail. - Winston Churchill
He speaks English, Spanish, and he's bilingual too. - Don King
Ireland is a fruitful mother of genius, but a barren nurse. - Unknown
Germlish: Training done using a mixture of English & German - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The best thing I know between France and England is the sea. - Douglas Jerrold
The monarchical institution in England is immensely valuable. - Malcolm Muggeridge
The English have three vegetables and two of them are cabbage. - Walter Page
Britain's last gold medal was a bronze in 1952 in Helsinki. - Nigel Starmer-Smith
If the French were really intelligent, they'd speak English. - Wilfred Sheed
There'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood. - Bob Hope
Dublin University contains the cream of Ireland - rich and thick. - Samuel Beckett
All hockey players are bilingual. They know English and profanity. - Gordie Howe
In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce. - Francesco Caracciolo
In Ireland, a writer is looked upon as a failed conversationalist. - Unknown
To eat well in England you should have breakfast three times a day. - W Somerset Maugham
We have always found the Irish a bit odd. They refuse to be English. - Winston Churchill
The man who can dominate a London dinner-table can dominate the world. - Oscar Wilde
England is an empire, Germany is a nation, a race, France is a person. - Jules Michelet
The English are not an inventive people; they don't eat enough pie. - Thomas Edison
The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm. - Alexander Woollcott
When it's three o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London. - Bette Midler
I used to go missing a lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World. - George Best
Civilization - a heap of rubble scavenged by scrawny English Lit. vultures. - Malcolm Muggeridge
There are ways of singing in English that are not just the same as in French. - Coeur de Pirate
I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov
The people of England are never so happy as when you tell them they are ruined. - Arthur Murphy
The most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed". - Dorothy Parker
Humour is practically the only thing about which the English are utterly serious. - Malcolm Muggeridge
The English should give Ireland home rule - and reserve the motion picture rights. - Will Rogers
On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes
There's nothing like an English weirdo. We have the best nutters in the world. - Sharon Osbourne
I think of myself as being Jewish and Irish, despite the fact that I'm English. - Daniel Radcliffe
"The Hunchback Of Notre Dame" had the big fat English actor, Charles Lawson. - Archie Bunker
I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining. - Groucho Marx
Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
The noblest prospect which a Scotsman ever sees is the high road that leads him to England. - Samuel Johnson
I want a house with a garden, but slap bang in the centre of London. Next door to a sushi bar. - Michelle Dockery
Ireland is a small but insuppressible island half an hour nearer the sunset than Great Britain. - Thomas Kettle
Diatribe: 1. An extinct race; 2. The group of native Brits that worship the late Princess Diana. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown
I had to have some balls to be Irish Catholic in South London. Most of that time I spent fighting. - Pierce Brosnan
The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable. - Oscar Wilde
Larry Gogan: 'With what town in Britain is Shakespeare associated?'
Contestant: 'Hamlet'. - Larry Gogan
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno
If you find yourself saying, "But I can't speak English...", try adding the word "... yet". - Jane Revell
I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul
No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker
If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized. - Oscar Wilde
If the English language made any sense, 'lackadaisical' would have something to do with a shortage of flowers. - Doug Larson
The longest word in the English language is the one following the phrase, "And now a word from our sponsor." - Hal Eaton
Isn't it a very curious thing that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland an' the English brought in the fleas. - Frank McCourt
'Good English' is whatever educated people talk; so that what is good in one place or time would not be so in another. - C S Lewis
The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan
It is Ireland's sacred duty to send over, every few years, a playwright to save the English theatre from inarticulate glumness. - Kenneth Tynan
In England people actually try to be brilliant at breakfast. That is so dreadful of them! Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast. - Oscar Wilde
The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin
Cricket - a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented in order to give themselves some conception of eternity. - Lord Mancroft
Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin