#1 humor site on the 'net

Hawaiian Surfboard Trade

Why some relationships end up on the rocks

Hawaiian Surfboard Trade thanks to joe-kster

Board: The fibreglass thingy under your feet

Hawaiian Surfboard Trade thanks to joe-kster

QuotaBills
Take my wife - please! - Henny Youngman

My wife gives good headache. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage is the sunset of love. - French Proverb

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. - Groucho Marx

The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard

Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight. - Georg C. Lichtenberg

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener. - Paula Deen

Those who trade liberty for security have neither. - John Adams

A deaf husband and a blind wife make the best couple. - French Proverb

No man should plant more garden than his wife can hoe. - Old Saying

Antibody: 1. Against everyone; 2. Your Uncle's wife. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My wife and I were happy for twenty years... then we met. - Rodney Dangerfield

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. - Oscar Wilde

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marriage is but for a little while. It is alimony that is forever. - Quentin Crisp

A protective tariff is a typical conspiracy in restraint of trade. - Thorstein Veblen

When your wife asks what's on TV, dust is not the right answer. - Unknown

The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman

There's one thing about a late marriage - it doesn't last long. - Unknown

Marriage halves our griefs, doubles our joys, and quadruples our expenses. - G K Chesterton

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage. - George Gobel

Apple: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The great majority of neuroses in women have their origin in the marriage bed. - Sigmund Freud

Marriage is very difficult. It's like a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle, all sky. - Cathy Ladman

Marriage is the harmony of God synchronizing two wills with the will of the Father. - Ravi Zacharias

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

A girl who thinks that a man will treat her better after marriage than before is a fool. - William C. Hall

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. - Joey Adams

I'm a very committed wife. I should be committed, too, for being married so many times. - Elizabeth Taylor

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay. - Milton Berle

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

Irish poets, learn your trade, sing whatever is well made, scorn the sort now growing up all out of shape from toe to top. - William Butler Yeats

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

When my wife says she'll be ready in 5 minutes, I know I have just enough time to fly to space and write a poem on the moon before we go. - Mike Vanatta


Yoda-Churchill

Cup of Mona Lisa

Bar Walker

Olympic Moon Rings

BTTF II Car

Pool Garden

Lunch Break on a Hot Day

Wait For My Human

China Road Load

Burger King Street

Taking The Bait

Redneck Tailgate

Horse Model

What Has America Become?

Billionaire Thoughts

New Style Ribs

Beware Of Sign

Into Fitness - Part I

Puddle Bath

Olympic Hurdle Joe

Katoomba Railway

The Importance Of Education

New Events for Summer Olympics

Don't Want Your Child To Text And Drive?